If you need assistance with suspected Adult ADHD symptoms or other brain-based organizational challenges, visit these national and local resources for evaluations, education, and potential treatment services. Please note: this listing is not an endorsement for any organization or practitioner by The Practical Sort. Do your due diligence in researching and selecting a service to fit your needs.
Spend time in community or in solitude in nature. Breathe deep. Listen to the sounds. Feel the wind on your skin. The raindrops falling. Do whatever works for you.
Caring for You
By far, the most practical tip I can give to you, to anyone this week is to please take care of yourself. Nothing, absolutely nothing is more important than taking care of yourself. It’s why you put your oxygen mask on first during an airline emergency so that you’re capable of helping others. Here are some tips to bolster your self-care at a time when many of us desperately need a lift.
With busy lives, non-stop demands, I realize that self-care is not an easy ask. Here are a few things you can try. Feel free to experiment, modify, go wild.
Remember whatever magic works for you may not be the formula for someone else. The more ideas in our tool kits, the better chance of finding workable options. Releasing unhelpful emotions in a somewhat constructive, safe way is far more helpful for our physical and emotional well-being than repressing. Tamped down emotions are likely to spring loose at unappreciated times and detrimental ways. Follow my current blog series on chronic conditions to learn more. Start with “Emotional Experiences & Symbolic Expressions” and “What's My Body Telling Me?” .
Feel free to share your ideas with me at sherri@thepracticalsort.com, and I will add them to this tip. Your resourcefulness may be the ticket to lifting up someone desperately needing it, but too depleted to know how to take the next step. Be well.
Unavoidable Holy Cow Messes
There are times when our homes are unavoidably a heaping mess. A stress-inducing, holy cow, mess. Even an organizer can’t make it better. Normally, we can help you decide what you want to keep or release. We can stack bins so that the tripping hazards are reduced. We can assist with sorting, packing, and labeling boxes to be loaded on to moving trucks or onto donation centers. We can help you create systems to remember what goes where. We can do lots of things. We can make magic. We’re not miracle workers.
Enduring The Holding Pattern
Early stages of remodel disruption. Limited access to storage area, lots of relocated items, numerous safety hazards, and loads of patience required.
There are times when we’re in a holding pattern. Enduring the inconveniences amidst extensive home repairs or remodeling. Those times, days, weeks, and occasionally months, can be exceedingly unnerving. No choice but to live in the chaos; the visual overload; the safety hazards; the confusion over where things are temporarily stored; limited access to what you need. No option but to ride out situations. If you’re lucky, you might have the option to temporarily relocate yourself to more suitable accommodations until things get better.
More times than I care to count, my homes have been in intolerable dirty disarray stemming from major reconstructive repairs and remodels. I had to summon loads of patience as those projects ran their obstacle courses. Multiple projects encountered prolonged delays and setbacks. I try to ensure that we’re not hosting guests during those times to keep life simple as possible.
For me, resettling back into normalcy is extraordinarily cathartic. It’s the reason I’m normally conscientious about keeping tidy spaces. Visual disturbances exacerbate concentration difficulties. Cluttered surfaces slow or impede bill paying, meal prepping, mending clothes, and any activity that requires spreading out. And with less space rehab, I can more quickly prepare for last minute guests and avoid embarrassment should someone show up unannounced. I ensure there’s always room on the sofas for relaxing. Bathrooms and kitchen are relatively clean for less shameful gross-out.
Keeping Up When It’s Not in the Cards
Even if our homes aren’t under-going transitions, we often do. Times when we’re too ill physically or emotionally to keep up with to-dos. Times when are calendars are inescapably busy like holiday season. Times when we absorb other peoples’ belongings as they transition from one situation to another. Sometimes we just need to take a breath and allow our reserves to reset until we’re capable of getting back on track. We might need to gird our loins and seek assistance within our personal networks or from applicable professionals. Not easy for those who thrive on independence, have little budget wiggle room, and/or don’t wish to appear incapable or needy. Hopefully it helps to know that we all find ourselves there at one point or another. There is no shame in saying “I need an extra set of eyes, ears, hands, thoughts, expertise”, whatever is needed.
Minimize Chaos
In the meantime, here are a few ways to minimize the chaos and create safety zones to avoid unforeseen hazards.
Conserve Your Spoons…Right-Size Holidays for a More Harmonious, More Gleeful, Less Stressed Experience All Around
Are you familiar with the “Spoon Theory of Neurodiversity”? Attributed to writer Christine Miserandino who coined “Spoon Theory” as a way to manage life despite debilitating illness symptoms, in her case related to lupus. “Spoon Theory” boils down to the expenditure and conservation of mental and physical resources. Those with neurodivergent traits theorectically start out with less spoons or resources at the start of each day than those defined as neurotypical. Then each task expends more spoons per activity if neurodiverse. This year, similarly to what many of us experienced during the depths of the covid pandemic, I’ve been noticing a scarcity of spoons in my personal and professional circles possibly in relation to world and US events among other hurdles in daily life. Most of my own spoons seem to be lodged deep in the dishwasher. I’m scrambling into my own toolbox to reset my spoon place settings in order to get through each day with a semblence of fortitude and motivation. Not easy.
As we approach the autumn and winter holiday seasons, particularly for those with limited spoons and/or prone to overwhelm tendencies, like myself, I offer the following holiday right-sizing prep tips. Right-sizing for your own unique needs can modulate untold levels of stress to our already over-exerted minds and bodies, not to mention monetary budget, calendars, and home spaces.
Here are a few reprinted tips to help you notch it down a tad so that your all-embracing reserves are reinforced just a bit. Play around with the techniques. Keep track of what works and what doesn’t so next year there’s no need to reinvent your wheels.
Planning a holiday gathering?
1. Right-size the crowds
2. Right-size the menus
Not all budgets, schedules, and bandwidths can support major feast preparation.
Lessen the burden on you.
Pre-prepare as much as you can to alleviate last minute spazzing.
3. Right-size the gifts
The rough economy over the last several years isn’t breaking news. Wallets and bank accounts have taken a sizeable hits. No one will fault you for respecting your financial boundaries. And, if they do take issue, it’s a shame we can’t gift a dose of compassion.
Of course, it’s tougher when it’s the kids wanting items beyond realistic reach. Yet, think about the value of learning to live within our means. A budgeting lesson might be one of the best, longest lasting gifts you can give. If it would truly break your or their hearts, seek other budgeting options. Cut elsewhere (such as a pared down guest list to save $$$ on grocery purchases) or divy the gift cost with amenable relatives. They might be looking for gifting options themselves. Save them the brain-spin.
If your space is overloaded, consider material-alternatives such as gifting a certificate to a trendy new restaurant. Or perhaps a community play or concert series. As I’ve mentioned many times in the past, financially supporting my adult children’s cell phone service via an annual family plan saves them money, and is an uncomplicated gift from my husband and I each year. Sometimes, the simplest ideas are overlooked and highly appreciated. Check in with the giftee first to see if the idea will be well received.
4. Right-size the mailing list
Each year, hubby and I receive less greeting cards and more e-cards. Not quite as satisfying as finding holiday greetings in the mailbox and holding a family newsletter in your hands. The reduced environmental impact outweighs my physical fulfillment.
5. Right-size your expectations
Most importantly, and this is something that I have to work on 24/7, it’s right-sizing expectations. We often want to give everything our all. To make all the bits shiny, beautiful, and memorable. But if we’re stressed out and stretched too thin, the memories we leave behind might not be as shiny as we’d like. Give yourself the grace to set boundaries and operate within them as well you can. That will render the finest holiday for you and those around you. Right-size and it will be alright.
If “having no time” is keeping you from accomplishing idle to-do list items, try noticing how you’re allocating your time elsewhere without judgment or recriminations. Use the info to determine which tools will propel action. Image by Steve Buissinne from Pixabay
Building Awareness Around Having No Time for ‘X’
If “having no time” is keeping you from accomplishing idle to-do list items, try this. Notice what you’re doing in place of that action. And here’s the critical part. No judgment or recriminations, simply take stock how you’re spending the days, hours, minutes.
It’s not uncommon to think we have no time when in reality, there might be ample or at least some space in our calendar. However, we choose to use the time in other ways because we find the task is…
Your project might call for the involvement of others. In that case, your timeline is dependent upon their availability and willingness. If external assistance is required, you might need to research contractors, reviews, and pricing. Then allow time to budget funds. All or any of that is often cause for complete or partial shutdown.
For now, just pay attention to the reasons for not making progress on any home tasks. Sometimes having awareness of the hurdle(s) will help you select the appropriate tool in your toolkit to move forward.
Register for the ‘Get it Done’ series to take steps toward headway now. Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay
Next week we’ll look at options for addressing each of these obstacles. In the meantime, if you notice your reasons for inaction, feel free to create your own solutions. Here’s one tool to add to your kit. Register mow for the next online ‘Get it Done’ series beginning November 6, December 4, 2024, and January 8, 2025. I’ll be there to answer questions and provide guidance when needed including timed breaks. The rest is up to you. Can’t stay for the entire time? Duck out as needed. Hold yourself accountable to make headway during 90 full minutes of allocated time for your project(s). For you.
Wednesday, November 6, December 4, 2024 and January 8, 2025
10:00 AM 11:30 AM (Pacific Time)
$75 for 3 sessions
When "where does this thing go?" stops you cold and piles continue grow, try this experiment to move your project forward before the upcoming holidays and always.
Last week I republished a very practical tip to address scattered piles. Jumpstart now. Avoid last minute fall/winter holiday freak-out down the road.
You took my advice. You’re ready to launch. Your eyes are set on one particular pile. That’s a start. Then nothing. The obstacle? Aside from sheer overwhelm? Putting things away. No idea where this or that goes. Bottom-line, ever-growing mounds scattered through the house.
Most days, the thing in your hand gets dropped on…
Believe me, you’re so not alone. Similar tales have been told by self-described neurotypicals and diagnosed neurodivergents. Before you beat yourself up or dwell on the piles any longer, let’s dig into one mound, slow and steady with the aid of your imagination.
Feel free to modify the technique to meet your needs. There’s no failure. If something doesn’t work well or at all, please don’t give up or give into recriminations like “this always happens” or “I suck at organizing.” Those are energy and time wasting goblins. Even organizers don’t hit home runs the first time on all jobs.
Use Your Imagination or Inner Wisdom as Your "Where Does it Go?" Guide
From the Windows of Your Imagination to Taking Action with Your Feet and Hands
At last, you’re pumped to take action at home, on your home. Too many piles, too little space, too much aggravation. Your story is more common than you might think. What do you do to move forward with a little less grinding against the wheel? Before undertaking any organizing project; more importantly before engaging a professional organizer, this week I’m sharing a few strategies to add to your game plan along with ideas for your toolkit. Save yourself irritating wasted efforts and potentially squandered $$$.
Seek Clarity.
Start on a good foot by clarifying why you want to embark on any organizing project. Contemplate the questions below. It’s ok to let each percolate. Notice superficial knee-jerk reactions, a sure-fire way to miss the forest among the trees. Go deep. Go as deep as you can to excavate what’s hiding beneath the obvious.
What do I mean by beneath the obvious? I know my own (and most organizers’) marketing. I’ve read about the many advantages of an organized lifestyle in magazines, books, and newspaper articles. I’ve not only read them; I’ve been featured in numerous publications. I’ve watched the organizing TV segments. I’ve appeared on a few. I’m well versed in the catalogue of decluttering benefits and techniques for object storage and arrangement. I’m clear on the minor to severe detriments of personal and workplace spatial chaos. The type of chaos that can further complicate the lives of adults navigating daily through neurodivergent traits Bottomline, I know why you “should” be organized.
BUT, you’re not me, or any of the other experts. What are your reasons for seeking a more organized lifestyle, presuming you’re craving a greater level of organization or any organization at all? Quite possibly aspects of your life will improve. I won’t make assurances. My story is I can’t function among disarray in my own spaces. Maybe you can’t either. Working with clients in their homes, different story. I’m not living there or need concerted concentration. Their chaos is expected.
Before scheduling a phone consult with me, prospective clients are required to complete a profile form. This information helps me to understand motivations, challenges, and to begin assessing whether we’ll be a good fit. The most important question is “what is the reason you’re requesting assistance?” 9 times out of 10, clutter is causing distress.
Clear enough, I’ve got a rough picture of the situation. I’m looking for the deeper context. Clutter rarely, if ever, creates itself. We could argue extenuating circumstances. For example, you inherited your parents’ furniture and household goods when they relocated into assisted living. Where does all that go when storage space was already non-existent? Do you have to accept it? Is it possible to donate pieces from your collection that are old, outdated, no longer your style to make room? Can you pass furnishings along to another relative who may need to furnish a residence? We have choices and agency over our own spaces depending upon other resident preferences. Undoubtedly, that requires negotiation.
Let’s go through the preliminaries step by step.
Clarify the reason
I listed a variety of precipitators causing my clients to seek organizing or coaching assistance. Those tell a partial story. “There’s no room”, “what do I keep?”, “where does this go?” are the tips of the icebergs. My goal is to have my clients learn sustainable skills to successfully manage after I’m out of the picture. That means we need to figure out what’s behind these precipitators.
What’s your clutter tolerance? Does it require addressing? What’s causing the clutter? What’s an ideal approach? Read on before embarking on your project for a more successful outcome. Image by Bill Kasman from Pixabay
Once we begin drilling down, we might discover long patterns of over-consumption. Too many things filling too little space. Then it’s not just what do I get rid?, it’s how do I adjust my purchasing patterns.
We learn that too many commitments are habitually filling the calendar with no breathing room for rest and recovery. Without restoration, there’s no energy or desire to buckle down. Naturally, there’s no time either. Best intentions get diverted. How do boundaries around personal time fit it? What needs to change to create beneficial boundaries? The same can be true for overconsumption of foods or specifically unhealthy products.
If the reason is relationship distress around too much stuff or object storage location, reflect on whether disorganization and clutter are the only perpetual battlegrounds? If yes, that’s something I could work with. If not, then a couple’s therapist might be more helpful. I’ve worked with a client or two facing ultimatum duress. “Clean it up or else!” Needless to say, those clients didn’t enthusiastically engage in their projects, and our relationships ended after a few sessions. Progress was made while I was there, little to nothing happened in between. Spaces quickly deteriorated once again.
Clarify intention
What do you hope to accomplish? What’s the scope of the project? A corner of a room, the entire room, or the whole house? Are you under a deadline like an impending move or a roommate moving in? How much is reasonable to achieve within your available time? Budget your time, energy, and dollars accordingly to address what you can. If the project is really big, grab other household members, friends, relatives, or a Professional Organizer to make it doable.
Clarify roles
Once you get others onboard, decide who does what to avoid stepping on toes (literally and figuratively if spaces are cramped). If you’re minimizing or downsizing, provide guidance as to what you’re willing to part with and what goods must remain or need special handling care.
Choose your team carefully. People who are committed, won’t distract you, or run off to scroll social media every few minutes, understand any quirks, and who are unlikely to judge you.
Clarify upkeep
How do you intend to keep newly organized spaces as pristine or functional as they are once you’ve finished? What’s your tolerance level without letting it all slide?
Communicate reasons for object placement if that’s important or label shelves, cabinets, drawers if necessary. If others tend to dump used goods wherever they left off, let them know that you will appreciate their help in keeping you on track. If that still doesn’t work, strategically place catch-all baskets to temporarily store items needing relo until you have time to rehouse them. Overflowing baskets are a solid indication the baskets need attention.
If that still doesn’t work, play around until you find methods that improve the situation to a degree that lowers the stress volume.
Final Thoughts
If getting and staying organized will cause you additional, unwanted stress, then it may not be worth it for you. Some people operate more comfortably and successfully in chaos.
Recommendations before giving up
Before dismissing home organizing entirely, even if it doesn’t work at first, here’s what I’d recommend.
Things to watch out for
Engaging a Professional Organizer
If you’re considering hiring a Professional Organizer (PO)...
NAPO (National Association of Productivity and Organizing Professionals) must meet core training criteria in order to be listed on the NAPO website. You may notice a badge of approval on some profiles. Frankly, I didn’t pay extra for the badge, basically a way to ensure that organizers carry insurance. My policy covers professional liability and errors/omission. The badge is different from a Certified Professional Organizer (CPO). A CPO has engaged in many hours of education and on the job experience along with passing a rigorous exam. Your job may or may not require a CPO.
I’ve worked with numerous clients frustrated by previous PO engagements who were seemingly unaware of or didn’t understand neurodivergent traits. Everyone is unique, every situation is different. We aren’t experts in all people. However, if you prefer to work with someone who has experience partnering with neurodivergent clients, ensure familiarity before signing on. You can look for affiliation with the Institute for Challenging Disorganization (ICD). ICD offers classes and a large catalogue of resources for delving deep into disorganizational struggles. I’ve accumulated hundreds of hours of ICD coursework. You can also look for affiliations or training through Children and Adults with Attention-Deficit/Hyperactivity Disorder (CHADD) and Attention Deficit Disorder Association (ADDA). The same applies to coaches. Is it important to you to work with a coach with a particular set of skills or training? There’s a vast wealth of coaching specialties available. Inquire about their training, experience, modalities, etc. I recently earned my certification as a Neurodiversity Coach. Hundreds of hours of education, training, and on the job experience to back it up.
In all honesty, not all of my clients have been a good fit for a variety of reasons, or I may have not fit their needs. I’m no longer working on-site. Some clients realized they couldn’t do the physical work themselves, and had no one else to turn to for the heavy lifting or the budget. There have been other break-up reasons as well. No one’s fault, just not a fit. That’s ok. A PO will recognize misalignments and potentially refer to someone else or release the client with good wishes. The way I see it, your project is about you, not me. Do what’s best for you and your circumstances.
When we think we need to set aside large chunks of time to accomplish our intentions, we can face oppressive hurdles. How do you manage time allotments for compassionate flow? Read on.
Image by Tumisu from Pixabay
Whether you have a lot on your plate or only one big project you’ve been intending to tackle, take note of these recommendations if you’re prone to overwhelm. Intentions to take the day, half a day, or only several hours might feel too big. Then what happens when something feels, looks, or sounds…
Do you procrastinate? Find something more interesting to do? Never get to it at all? Brain spinning, boredom, or in some drastic cases sheer terror brought on by full-blown overwhelm, are not recipes for conquering to-dos. There are options to suit the way you function.
That Went Too Fast
I’m bemused when I hear “90 minutes went far too fast” at nearly all of my ‘Get it Done’ events, including last week’s. Who would ever think 90 minutes would seem fast? If I suggested to you to set aside 90 minutes to clean your house, file papers, or any household chore, dreaded or not, would that prompt you to ask “you want me to do what for how long?” Would it send you into a full-blown panic? Would you immediately negotiate downward the number of minutes? How could you possibly stick with something or focus for an hour and a half? Unless it’s a hyperfocus-prone passion. Hyperfocus means hours without a bathroom break, forgetting to eat, and missed appointments. I could be wrong, you might think, 90 minutes, no biggie! I doubt I would.
Yes, 90 minutes can feel crushingly long before you start a chore or plod through when you’re not digging it. 60 minutes of yoga, particularly when I’m hungry, overwrought by an overly busy schedule, or enduring one too many planks, feels like a freaking lifetime. Most weeks, if I thought that I have to hold poses for an hour, I likely wouldn’t be inclined to go as often or at all.
So how do I mentally handle a 60-minute chunk of yoga time when I’m not feeling it? If I’m tired, staving off hunger pangs, or consumed by the number of tasks that await me after class, I cut deals. I promise myself that I only have to make it through 12 minutes, then I’m free to leave. Since class is online, there’s no embarrassment if I were to sneak out early. Totally plausible. When that 12 minutes is up, I renegotiate another 12 minutes. Make it through the full 60 minutes, there’s a promise of a small treat after dinner. When I’m not distracted by hunger or life outside class, and simply lose myself in the breathing and poses, the class flies by rapidly similarly to 90 minutes at ‘Get it Done’. We’re immersed in the flow.
Techniques to Align to Time Allotments
How can you align yourself to getting things done within available time and energy without overscheduling, underscheduling, or flipping out?
If you’re struggling to find an iota of motivation to start any household task and eventually follow-through to completion, one very useful tool for anyone, especially adults with ADHD traits, is to experiment with this very effective technique. What is it? Read on...
Image by Anemone123 from Pixabay
If you’re struggling to find an iota of motivation to start and eventually follow-through to complete any household task that is…
It’s very likely the task will get pushed aside temporarily or not done at all. Adults colliding with their ADHD traits are even less likely to find enticements to face any actions that fall within or beyond those reasons. That is, unless there’s a “shiny thing”, an enjoyable thing, a gamey thing, a quick thing to induce action or distract away from the detractors. One very useful tool for anyone especially those with ADHD traits is to buddy up.
How to Buddy in Person
Allow your buddy the latitude to help you however it makes sense to you and them. It’s ok for you to work on one segment of a task while they address another or something completely different. You can sort through papers while they categorize your pantry or toss in a load of laundry.
If you can’t figure out how your “in-person” buddy can assist you, try body-doubling. A body-double’s role is malleable to your needs, and is there to provide quiet or active support. Having their presence, sitting quietly observing, can be very effective if you just need someone to ensure you stay focused and accountable until you finish or arrive at a natural or pre-determined stopping point. Alternatively, turn to them to lend a hand to lift or relocate heavy objects, or haul away relocation items or perform other essential tasks, then your project will progress with less resistance and tension.
Don’t underestimate the power of an extra set of eyes, ears, hands, and thoughts to observe and guide you through when you’re stuck or overlook pathways forward or around hurdles.
But My Buddy isn’t Here
Your buddy doesn’t have to be “in person” if that’s not possible and a physical assist isn’t required. Set up a time to work together remotely to keep each other on task. If your buddy doesn’t have a project, knock out a few mindless tasks such as dusting, filing, loading the dishwasher during your chat. Choose actions that don’t require studious focus. Let your buddy know that your attention may not be fully engaged with the conversation. Nevertheless, their virtual assistance is greatly appreciated. Before you know it, you’ll be finished.
Remote buddies are great for accountability check-ins if your calendars don’t synch. Text your buddy that you’re intending to work on a project on Tuesday at 10 am (or whenever). You can let them know a day or two ahead that you’re prepping your workspace to be ready to launch on Tuesday. Then send a start text to let them know that you’ve begun, and again where and when you left off, and your intentions to resume in case you forget. Ensure that your buddy is game for being a remote accountability source. Trade off with each other if they need an assist as well.
5 Key Elements to a Successful Buddy System
Find someone who will be
Be willing to release each other without regret or recrimination if you give it a solid try and it doesn’t work out for one reason or another. Take intentional breaks and restart if things or schedules go haywire.
Commitment to success and to the partnership is strategic for whatever type of process you select. Strive for a commitment to show up for the scheduled sessions, and to honor your roles.
Consistency is key to making progress. Whether you schedule once a week or once a month, set a date and time and stick with it.
Together design whatever type of process will work for you both whether it’s diving in at your place or theirs. If you rotate, how will that work? How long will each session last and how often? How frequently should you take mid-session refresher breaks, and how do you encourage the other person to return when the buzzer sounds and their deep into emails or social media without nagging? Do you work in silence or with music? What type of music, energizing or soothing, or a mix? If you agree to remote texting, what does that look like?
Does it make sense to establish a consequence ante? For example, you each get one cancellation or delay freebie within a specified period of time. Beyond that, you might owe your partner a coffee/tea date or gift card. Set your own criteria.
You’re the designer(s), go wild with creativity. Feel free to play around until you find processes and methods that work and feel comfortable. You and your buddy don’t have to have identical approaches, only a commitment to accountability.
Another Supportive Accountability Option
If you need additional accountability and support or don’t have a buddy to call upon, please join me at my upcoming ‘Get it Done’ events. Their fun, impactful, and economical. For more information and to register ASAP to grab your spot, click the buttons below.
Wednesday, September 11, and October 2, 2024
10:00 AM - 11:30 AM (Pacific Time) 11:00 AM-12:30 PM (MT)
$25 per session
Register now before you forget. Grab your spot. Questions? Email me at sherri@thepracticalsort.com.
Words Matter
The Practical Sort’s September’s accountability and support event will be here in a blink. If you haven’t been, it’s an effective, fun way to accomplish awaiting to-dos. Confession time, I don’t completely love the title ‘Get it Done’. Imagine that. A recovering perfectionist observing something may not be perfect. I’m open to suggestions for reworking the title. Since offering the first event, I changed the name a time or 2. I didn’t know exactly what I wanted. Here’s what I don’t want.
“Finish it”
That command applies pressure. It has to be completed, and now. Urgency can be a powerful motivator. If it works for you, use whatever works. Urgency can also create unpalatable levels of stress. Stress leads to a host of physical and emotional ailments along with procrastination, avoidance, or ripping through half-fast. You might accomplish that urgent thing now; however, if you’re waylaid for the rest of the day or week due to a stress-induced condition, that’s less helpful.
“Stop Procrastinating”/”Stop Avoiding”
Neither of those sang to me. For anyone with Adult ADHD or similar traits, there’s rarely an escape from the litany of self-critical thoughts and self-berating. You don’t need me adding any blame or shame. Chances are if you’re procrastinating or avoiding action, that’s an opportunity to go deeper. What’s holding you back? My recently revised Organizing Cheat Sheets are downloadable to help you examine reasons you may be stuck along with some ideas to realign your operations to move forward.
“Work Party”
If you have ADHD traits, how often are you thinking I want more work? Sign me up! I suppose I could consider going with “Play Time.” Nah, my internal radar is sensing “LIAR.” You might dig household tasks and projects. I suspect anyone experiencing avoidance isn’t viewing chores as recreational prospects. Theoretically attendees work on a variety of home projects. But why rub it in? I want the event to be enticing. An enjoyable way to finally make progress on languishing tasks.
There are other names I considered and rejected. As I’m no marketing genius, and it does tug at my perfectionist tendencies to entitle the event something I don’t totally love. It is what it is until I find something that wows. The point is wording, phrasing, they matter. See for youself.
Take These Phrases for a Test Drive
It doesn’t take a genius to recognize that supportive language can ultimately make the difference between how we perceive the task, and more importantly ourselves. A word or two can make or break a deal. If you don’t believe me take the 2 sentences below for a test drive. Say each sentence aloud. Then spend a second noticing whether you somatically (feel it in your body) or emotionally sense a difference between how each phrase lands.
“I’m a procrastinator.” [Pause and notice]
“I’m a doer.”
No judgement if there’s no difference. Some react more strongly to vocabulary than others. If you noticed a variance, what happened? Which phrase was more disturbing or supportive? How did each manifest within you? The first caused a pit in my stomach and my shoulders began to rise as my neck muscles tightened. You might find the first sentence to be a motivating provocateur. A challenge to a duel of “I’ll show you!.” Again, if it works, rock on. Use any gleaned awareness to guide you toward self-supportive language in moments of self-flagellation.
Opportunity Without Shame
The bottomline is if you’re struggling to get anything done around your home, whether the reason is strategic (such as a budget shortfall) or the reason is, as one client exclaimed, “lame” because she didn’t want to, I don’t wish to reinforce excuses to shy away from the event or instill unintentional shame. What I can provide is an opportunity to help you move past the emotional roadblocks preventing action, possibly scoring a check mark on your to-do list.
Here’s the link for more information and to register for the September 11 ‘Get it Done’ event. For doubling the accountability, support, and achievement, register for October’s too all at once as a way to efficiently get more done!
Wednesday, September 11, and October 2, 2024
10:00 AM - 11:30 AM
$25 per session
Register now. Grab your spot. Questions? Email me at sherri@thepracticalsort.com.
The A-Z’s—Organize Your Time, Space, and Mind
High levels of clutter, lost and misplaced items, overscheduled calendars all wreak havoc on already overtaxed, overwrought, overwhelmed brains. The longer stuff languishes, awaiting attention, the greater chance inertia solidifies its roots. All those excess things eat up space. Visual and kinesthetic noise gnaw at real estate in your brain. Anxiousness intensifies. You want to start, but where? How? “If I only knew, I’d do it. I’ll wait until…” The day never seems to get here.
Let’s go back to the basics. Start with the ABCs. Make organizing simple and doable.
Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay
Let’s end the struggling. Start with the ABCs. Make organizing simple and doable. I’ll take you back to the basics so you can make headway. Over the next A-Z 26 weeks, each tip will introduce organizing skills, cognitive techniques, and well-care practices to help you get through home-based tasks.
Experiment with the A-Z strategies each week to stridently accomplish your to-dos. To avoid emo-overwhelm, I’m only introducing one letter each week. Overwhelm is a sure-fire way to encounter internal resistance.
Once all the letters have been presented, continue to practice. If you’re a linear thinker go from A to Z or Z to A. If you are a non-linear processor, print this out, cut up the sections into strips, put them in a jar, and pull out a new letter each day, week, or month. Or, better yet, go with whatever methodology works for your neural pathways.
There are no guarantees any of the suggestions will work. I presume that no technique will last without occasional tweaks as you build new habits. Need a distraction while getting started? Sing or hum ABCs or other tunes during chores to while away the minutes. Hi-ho, Hi-ho it’s off to work around our homes we go. Here’s Week One’s experiment—
Use these A-letter words to take organizing Action this week. Image by Pete Linforth from Pixabay
The Letter A
A. Take any Action to move you forward. Silence Annoying judgment. There’s no failure. Period. There’re only steps that do or don't Align with the way you Assess, think, or process. Don't know where or how to Approach the problem? Ask for help from someone who has the Acuity, tools, or connections to get you Activated or move you through. Analyze glitches and hiccups. Adjust Angsty Attitudes. Alter process Applications to suit your preferences. Assay Alternative Avenues to Achieve Accomplishments. Assign times and days to chores and projects to Afford yourself Autonomy, direction, and Accountability. Appeal to a supportive person to help keep you Accountable.
Be open to trying these letter ‘B’ tips. Boldly get the Ball rolling and get down to Business. Begin your organizing with Bite-sized pacing and Beneficial ease.
Image by Pete Linforth from Pixabay
B. Breathe. Lose yourself in deep Blissful Breaths to forget how much you dread or feel Boredom for what you're doing. Boldly Believe you know how to do it and just Begin. Buddy up & Binge clean one room or one space. Boil the project down into Breezy, Bite-size Bits if it seems too Big. Banish Baiting distractors and time wasters until you have met your goals or need a reprieve. Break for a refresher as needed, maybe every 7 minutes if you tire easily or every 43 minutes if your energy and available time allow. Then Blast through to the finish or you arrive at a Beneficial stopping point. At the end, Be a pal. Bestow a yummy treat or movie night to yourself and any of your assistants as thanks for a Bang-up job.
‘C’ which techniques Cultivate a productive and Contemplative frame of mind. Competently Cruise through your Checklist with less Consternation and higher levels of Completion.
Image by Peggy and Marco Lachmann-Anke from Pixabay
The Letter C
C. Comfort is your friend. Too hot, too cold, too dark, too bright, too itchy, too noisy, all of these are Confounding distractions. Consider Cozy Clothing that will satisfy your body. Captivate your mind for greater Concentration, Creativity, productivity, and Calmness. Choose Classic rock, Country, Classical or your Cherished music genre, or a Compelling podcast that will get you pumped for Checklist action or Chill your nerves. Create Clutter-free environments that will Coddle your soul. Curate objects that enliven your spirit or fulfill a need. Cast away those bearing emotional distress or simply take up space.
Drive toward successful outcomes. Deploy this week’s tips designed to help you dexterously navigate through daily demands.
Image by Stefania Grieco from Pixabay
D. Draft an organizing game plan. Determine what’s important to you now and for your future self. Make Deliberate choices to support your Destiny. Dismiss any Dictating “shoulds”. Defer to “I could” as a less Demanding, guilt-imposing option. Decide where you can make maximum impact or score a quick, Definitive win. Divide your calendar activities between personal, professional, family obligations, and household maintenance. Devote time for self-care. If you're not feeling Divine, work becomes harder and you'll become physically and emotionally Depleted. Draw upon the resources within your life. Divy up responsibilities according to Designated strengths, preferences, time, and energy. Dispose the items and thoughts that no longer serve you. Donate! Someone in need will Delight in your old treasures. Don’t beat yourself up for mistakes or Deficiencies. Do acknowledge any and all good Deeds & achievements.
Letter E guides you to Examine the areas of your life that aren’t serving you. Invites you to take Effective action to begin making Essential Edits.
Image by Madhulika Rawal from Pixabay
The Letter E
E. Examine the areas of your life that aren’t serving you. Take Effective action to begin making Essential Edits. Eradicate physical and mental stuff that weighs you down. Eliminate Excess, non-priority commitments from your calendar when Exhausted. Calender clutter is about as helpful to Elemental body and cognitive abilities as cluttered spaces. Energy zappers won’t do you any favors when you need brainpower or vitality. Elect actions that Elicit productivity or Enjoyment. Eat smart. Exercise in a way that fits your body, mind, and schedule. Extract budget Eroders so you have finances to Endow whatever form of Entertainment Excites you.
How can you use the letter F to guide your through your days with greater flow and function? Follow these tips.
Image by Anna Pham from Pixabay
F. Flexibility is Fundamental to achieve First-rate Function. Honor the way your brain and body Facilitate action. Fight against them, and you’ll set yourself up to Flail and Flop. Focus on your priorities, address the things that need attention or Fulfill you. Get creative to Fashion unpalatable tasks into some Form of Fun. Free up time by ferreting out tasks to others when appropriate. Forget making piles. Finish using something? Funnel it back to its storage location or Find a better, more logical Fit elsewhere. Fidgeting will slow you down. Handling objects only once is Faster than sorting through massive mounds. Figure out where things go and ferry them to various storage destinations. File to the level of detail that works for you. The more Fastidious, the easier it is to find what you need. If the system is too Fussy, chances are you won’t Follow-through if that's not your thing. Fracture large, scary projects into Feasible, bite-size pieces. Forge ahead one step at a time Fielding a Flowing pace to keep a cool, Free-spirited head in the game.
Grab the most out of your days with these G letter prompts. Image by 502760 from Pixabay
The Letter G
G. Employ these letter G strategies for Game-changing productivity and General well-care. Grab every second off the clock to Ground through daily priorities or want-to-dos. Get a jump start on your day by waking up 17-29 minutes earlier. Give the snooze button a boot. Greet the day with your own form of “Get-up and Go.” Grease the neuro and muscular wheels via exercise, meditation, journaling, a step-by-step Goal-oriented Game-plan. Gain momentum on “no-sweat” to-dos before Grappling with the rest of your day. Gather clutter and any Garbage around your home that Garner agita. Gain a sense of the errant keepers, then Guide them back to their proper or logical storage location. Dispose unwanted Goods via Giving away to charity, Gifting, recycling and as a last resort trashing. Gravitate toward activities that Gratify, energize, Groom your passions, and Generate satisfaction. Gear up Grit for those Genuinely unavoidable, unpleasant actions. Gamify boring or Glee-less drudgery with creativity and Games such as “Beat the Clock” or scavenger hunts. Gradually tackle Grueling multi-step chores and assignments during times of the day when you have the Greatest cognition and the most Gusto. Reward yourself with Guiltless prizes for completion. Galvanize your physical and mental reserves by indulging in periodic Getaways for much-needed for refreshment and reinvigoration. Gift yourself Generous moments in the Greenery of Gardens, Gaiety of Group Gatherings, or a Gloriously relaxing bath when the world feels Gloomy and Grim. Gently get yourself back into action after tough circumstances, physical and mental depletion, Grief, illness or injury. Grant yourself a Guilt-free day if your body and mind aren’t Gyrating into a Groove. Find Gratitude whenever and however you can. When we're Grateful for what we have, our minds don't get bogged down in jealousy and inadequacies for what is lacking. Your brain and body will have Greater availability for your needs and wants.
Letter H techniques to Hasten your Housekeeping & other Have-tos, Help you thru Hurdles, and Hold you accountable until you Hit a Homerun.
Image by Prawny from Pixabay
H. Handpick durable, quality goods for less Harm to the environment and wallet Hemorrhaging. Hooks provide useful vertical storage to Heed visibility preferences or if Hangers and folding Hasten Headaches. Harmonize indoor Home spaces and outdoor Habitats with Homages to your Heart and Head. Harvest time in your calendar for Hobbies, sources of Humor, and above all good Health. Hatch an alternate game plan for when things go Haywire as an antidote to Hysterics. Horribly tech glitches, cancelled appts, traffic jams, broken appliances and other Hassles Hijack momentum, mostly when you’re in a Hurry. Hold yourself accountable to your dreams and goals. Honor yourself with rewards for jobs well done. Habits solidify through repetition. Harvest success with continual reinforcement. Hang onto Hope when you Hit a Hurdle. Harness Helpful resources to overcome Hindrances via online Hacks, your personal Helpmates, and Highly qualified professional coaches & organizers.
Incentivize and Ignite action with these letter I techniques. Image by Sue Cannon from Pixabay
The Letter I
I. Is your Inspiration to Induce forward motion Inanely Inert? Intentions are groovy. Actions lead to Improvements and accomplishments. Invoke the Innovative and Imaginative parts of your Inner Intelligence to Initiate a game plan for whatever is on your plate. Incentivize using your Individualized energy and focus toolkit resources. For Instance, Infuse your body and mind with an Invigorating Inhale to Instill Inner peace and Ignite Industrious Ingenuity. Increase music or podcast volume to Imbibe full energy. Identify priorities and Imperative or Immediate assignments. Insert Items on your calendar requiring full brainpower or high physical energy during your Ideal peak performance hours. Immerse yourself in Illustrative Imagery to Imagine each process step from start to completion. Invite your tactile senses to Interact with tasks to Imprint processes more fully into your memory. Ignore Irritating, distracting, goof-off Impulses until you’ve Invested your time, attention, and energy to Immensely Impact your checklist. Listen to your Intuition when task Intensity becomes too much, Integral focus wanes, or Intrinsic value diminishes. Those Instincts Indicate It's time to stop. Instead readjust and change the channel. Indulge in a mood booster. Tackle an Inevitable chore.
Jazz up your household chores, reduce Jumbled thoughts, and Jettison useless Junk with this week’s J letter tips.
Image by Mark Greaves from Pixabay
J. Feeling immersed in Jumbled thoughts and a Jungle of Junk? Jettison any and all things that have never or no longer have a Justifiable role in your life. You’ll have room to Jauntily move about, and more brain space for greater productivity, clearer thinking, attentive focus, and higher performance levels. Jot notes Just as to-do items pop into your head so you don't forget or prematurely Jump away from partially completed tasks. Use short, descriptive reminder prompts to expediently Jog your memory. Judge list items based on reasonable criteria such as priority, urgent, or non-critical, then assemble to-dos accordingly. If you’re prone to Juggling multiple processes at once, don’t Jeopardize quality for quantity. Constant Juking from one activity to another can cost you in ramp up and ramp down time, remembering where you were, or render careless mistakes. Judiciously allocate time and focus to each activity until you arrive at a natural Junction or stop-alerts. Join similar items and actions together for sensible storage and locating, and greater efficiency. Jazz up boring routines by alternating the time or day, give a buddy a Jingle to pass time quicker or request an assist. No need to Justify your mental and physical well-care. Joyful sanity-saving activities ought to be part of your weekly regimen.
Keenly knock-out organizing tasks, Know how to avoid motivation-Killing Kerfuffles, and Kick-start actions with these letter ‘K’ techniques.
Image by Beverly Buckley from Pixabay
K. Kickstart your day with less Kerfuffles by prepping the night before. Get into a Knack of Knowing where to assemble essentials Kits to get out the door quickly. Keep Keys, purse, tote, backpack, workout gear, and any other necessary to-go items on a hook or shelf near the door you typically exit (but out of sight of windows and potentially prying eyes). The backside of a coat closet is Keen for personal item privacy.
Knock out dull chores like folding laundry with helpful distractions such as Kickin’ podcasts, TV, or headset phone calls to catch up with your Kindred spirit pals.
Tough decisions unsurprisingly Kibosh organizing and downsizing endeavors. Keepsakes and other memorabilia are often the most daunting objects to Knock-out. Set those aside for now before they Kill your momentum. When you have a few quiet moments to yourself, Kick-off a Kitchen or cozy-area tea or coffee break. Then Knead through photo piles, old correspondence, Knick-Knacks, and hard to part with Kitsch. Kindly allow yourself, without judgment or recriminations, to narrow down the Keepers vs castouts.
Be Kind to yourself for any blunders. Knotty situations are bound to happen. Kudos for any and all forward motion.
Lessons Learned from the first Earth Day and ways to Lend a hand to Leave our Landscape Livable for future generations.
Image by Andreas Grönberg from Pixabay
L. In 1970, the first Earth Day Legitimized growing public concerns about the Lamentable and deleterious effects of water, Land, and air pollution on human and planetary health. The power of 20 million Like-minded Americans taking to the streets in demonstration and support of our global home, Launched the creation of the Environmental Protection Agency and a host of Landmark environmental protection Laws supported by Laudable Leadership from Liberals to Conservatives residing on both sides of the political aisle. This Legacy Led to burgeoning international policy initiatives. Since those early days, numerous Loathsomely Lethal chemicals have been banned, Leaky Landfills have been sealed, rivers in flames have Lapsed, Levels of dangerous substances in our food sources have been Lowered. Litigation against those Legally Liable for hazardous environmental contamination has provided for compulsory site cleanup and financial Loss-recovery penalties.
What can you do in support of Earth Day and every day? Please don’t Litter. Lend a hand by properly disposing Loose trash around your neighborhood. Use Less, from home goods to natural resources and all things in between. Let’s take Logical measures to ensure we Leave our planetary Landscape in Livable conditions for future generations.
Managing Minimal, Methodical Modulations to your lifestyle Menu May Merit a Myriad of Magical Manifestations. More organizing and lifestyle Missives as we look at the letter M.
Image by Madhulika Rawal from Pixabay
M. Minimize. Managing space and time is More efficient with less stuff Mucking up surfaces and activities on the calendar. Mind the number of tasks per day or Mitigate too many responsibilities by delegating to avoid Mix-ups and Monsoon-like, Morale-destroying overwhelm. Maybe say “NO” when one More thing will Massively Mutilate your Mood. Pencil in a Mid-day Moment to Modulate your Motivation and restore Momentum.
Not making progress Naturally? Need No-Nonsense tips? Navigate to the letter N.
Image by Nisha Gill from Pixabay
N. No time? Notice if your schedule is hampered by time wasters. Notate your activities each day for a week. Nullify Negotiable things that Negate progress. Numbingly stuck? Nominate assistants to help Narrow down things on your plate, Necessitate completion, or Nudge you to stay you on track. Allow your Non-linear brain to Navigate in a way that feels more Normal to your Neural pathways to counteract Needless stress. Nurture your creative mind with Nourishing Novelty. Newness is scary but Nevertheless intriguing. Neaten as you go along to Nick messes in the bud.
Organizing can be an Outstanding Operational tool to defeat Overwhelm and Other Out-of-Control, Overblown emotions. I Offer this week’s tips for Optimal time, space, and bandwidth Orchestration.
Image by Hassas Arts from Pixabay
O. Organizing can be an Outstanding Operational tool to defeat Overwhelm and Other Out-of-Control, Overblown emotions.
Orchestrate based on your calendar. Obligatory meeting in the morning? Before distractions Obstruct your intentions, pack paperwork and essential Objects in your tote bag right away. Opting to exercise at lunch? Toss workout accessories in your gym bag, and Off-load the bag into your car or in an Obvious (but safe) spot by the exit door. Orderly pairing of clothes and accessories for the week will Offset morning indecision. Orient tops and bottoms together and sling necklaces and bracelets onto the hangers for quick dress and go.
Overhaul your Outdated, Outgrown wardrobe to Open up more storage space.
Observe which techniques work for you and Obliterate the Obsolete. Old habits may not be serving you. Open your mind to new ways of doing things for Optimum productivity and greater efficiency. Overworking will Overload your brain, body, bandwidth, and schedule. Opulent Overspending will Overreach your budget. Over-stocking On stuff will Oversaturate your spaces. Balance is Optimal personally and professionally. Outsource where and when you can.
Letter P
P. Be Proactive. Preview your Pipeline for the upcoming week. Pay attention to Priorities and Pressing issues requiring Prompt action. Post them to Predominant Positions on your calendar. Be Pragmatic when under the gun. Put aside Piddling time eaters. If and when Possible, Parcel out tasks to People more Proficient at the job or who have Pockets of time to take things off your Plate.
Prevent Persistent, Perfectionistic Predicaments. Permit yourself to Prefer “good enough” standards.
Need Practical Processes? Prep lunches and breakfast ingredients Prior to cleaning up the kitchen at night for rapid, no-Panic grab and go in the morning. Also, advance Prep dinner ingredients for quick assembly when you arrive home uninspired and Pooped. Pare and chop fresh Produce. A chopper will speed up the Process. Place Perishable ingredients in a container and refrigerate until needed. Measure and assemble any dry ingredients. Pop the mixture in a slow-cooker for a Punctual dinner in the evening.
Practice new routines to get the hang of them. Persevere before Punting.
Process your Punchlist through Proactive Practices. Preview these Prompts for Premier Punctual, less Perfectionist, Proficiency.
Letter ‘P’ modified design Image by Dorothe from Pixabay
Quick ‘Q’ letter Quality tips for Quelling Quirky Quandaries and Quieting your mind.
Image by Brigitte Werner from Pixabay
Letter Q
Q. Without Question, don’t underestimate the power of Quiet time. Quality moments with your brain and body are important to Quickstep creativity, gather your thoughts, and be more relaxed to conquer Queued tasks. Quench your thirst, hunger or need for movement every few hours. Quantify priorities and boundaries over Quantity. Query whether Quizzical demands on your bandwidth and time are Quintessentially important. Quit whatever you are doing when your Quivering brain or body signal it’s time to stop your Quest until you feel more refreshed. Quell desires to scroll through the Quagmire of Quotidian social media posts and emails. Question devoting Quixotic time and attention to Quarrelsome events, people, and disQuieting daily news. Quarantine your emotional reserves.
Refer to ‘R’ letter Recommendations to Reexamine and possibly Restructure time and space Regulation. Reassess Rituals Requiring Refinement. Reinvent Realistic Routines and Resourceful strategies for Restorative Rewards.
Image by GrumpyBeere from Pixabay
R. Reexamine the Resplendent Rituals vs the Rescindable Remainders. Retain Resourceful strategies. Relinquish the Rest. Routines make Remembering easier. Record conspicuous Reminders. Reserve times that make Reasonable sense for you to build a Rhythm around such as brushing your teeth before bed and when you Rise.
Rethink, then Redesign storage Repositories to enable faster Relocation of Regularly used items.
Reimagine processes when Regimens become Ridiculously Rote.
Ration the Reservations on your schedule to Restructure time usage and productivity. Resist the urge to Refill every moment. Respect your Relative limits. Seek Refuge in a Restorative location to Refresh composure and Recharge your motivation when Resistance is Radically Rampant and frustration is Rattling. Then Restart with a Revived perspective. Refrain from Runaway Recriminations.
Release any and all Random Rubbish from physical and mental Reservoirs. Reserve Room to Reallocate to more Relevant stuff.
Regard your local and global environment. Reduce, Reuse, Recycle, and Repurpose.
Review Results at the end of each day. Remove completed tasks or finished projects from your to-do Registry. Reassess and Refine anything Requiring Resolution or Reformulation. Reward yourself with Recreation, Relaxation and whatever Recognition Restores or Rejunvenates Resilience. Requisite change is Rarely instantaneous. Remind yourself that you're doing a Rad job as you Relearn and Retrain. Repetition will Reinforce Revised skills and practices. No Regrets! Remember each day you Recommence with a Renewed slate.
So many letter ‘S’ tips. Start with a Selection to Simplify, Strategize, and Sail through your Scenarios with Seamless Support.
Image by Peggy und Marco Lachmann-Anke from Pixabay
Letter S
S. Start! A Sure-fire way to Sufficiently Sail toward Success is to Simply Start. Simplify as much as you can to Systematically Skate from Step to Step. Susceptible to Symptomatic Second-guessing? Scrutinize Surreptitious Self-doubts. Suspend Sneaky Skepticism. Subversive thoughts can Substantially keep you Stuck. Stand in your Strengths, Skills and Specialties. Not Savoring Straight-forward, Sequential Setups? Substitute a Scattering of Stimulating actions to Stay Summarily on track. Still at a Stultifying Standstill? Solo Scenes not Stroking your Senses? Summon your Social network for Synergizing extra eyes, ears, hands or body-doubling.
To Sidestep Supercharged Stress, Synchronize your clocks and alerts a few minutes ahead. A Sensible Surplus cushion Supports Speculative planning for Surprises Such as traffic Snarls, detours, or tech glitches. Set Strategic electronic alerts to Signify appointments, tasks, etc. Signal task wind downs too. Sound a 30-minute alert before you need to Scoot or Situate yourself for your next appointment Sequence. Switch on a 5-minute warning to pack up, Snag your tote or computer bag, and Scamper to the potty. Set a STOP alert when it’s time to Sashay out the door.
Sustain Sensory Satisfaction via Spaciousness in your calendar, your mind, and your Surroundings. Segment a Symbolic Sanctuary Somewhere in your Spaces for a Scenery Shift when you Struggle to Suspend Strong, Severe Emotional Surges, and to Shore up your Spirited Self when Sorely Stressed. Select and Switch among tasks to fit your Schedule, energy Streak, and priority Situation.
No Shame if misfiring Synapses, chronic Symptoms, or Syndromes Slow or Stymie progress. Sincere Self-Love and compassion will go a long way toward for whatever you Strive.
Letter T
T. Today is the day to Transcend excuses. Take charge of your Time, spaces, and health. Tactically plan out your days and Time usage. How? Triangulate to Top actions. Save room on your calendar To pencil in a Tad of TLC Tranquility mid-day or at The Tail-end.
Today is the day to Take charge of your Time, spaces, and health. How can you Tactically Tackle your To-dos? Transition Thoughtfully from Task to Task? Avoid distracting Temptations? Transform spaces and productivity by Testing out letter ‘T’ Techniques.
Image by Prawny from Pixabay
Temptations are everywhere, They will find you. Temper Taunting distractions via Thoughtful planning. First, Tend to Things needing attention. Limit Tempters such as social media and email in order to Trailblaze Through To-Dos or until an acceptable Termination point. If you Transgress along the way, accept That it happens. Turn the Tide by Tuning back into your stride. Temper motivation-killing rebukes. They’re not helpful. Trade-off Tortuous Tasks or Those That fall outside your Toolkit with someone who Thrives in that Terrain. Timers on social media will help you limit surfing Tendencies Tendering maximum minutes for Transformative uses.
Turn to Trivial Tasks when Throttled by Truncated brain power, or you’re Too Tired for Tough Technical processes, or you have a Taste for a quick, Trouble-free win. Try new Things without Timidity when you have Time. Tend Toward The Tried-and-True when you’re under Time-constraints, emotions are Testy, or you’re Thwarted by confusion.
Tone down last minute stressors, Troubleshoot Technology ahead of meetings or important deadlines. Target new route planning with map Apps to Turn aside Time and mood Thieving stress. Talk yourself Through unTried processes step-by-step when non-Traditional routes or methods feel Too Tangled.
Transform Tedious or Tremulous To-dos Through Terrific podcasts, music, or headphone Tete-a-Tetes with social Teammates. Teamwork is a Top-notch Technique for extroverts to efficiently knock out Taxing Things on your Timeline.
Terminate eventual clutter Tsunamis. Take a few minutes to Tidy daily. Thorough house cleaning goes much faster when There’s only a Touch of straightening up. Tailor spaces To match usage To enable Tip Top productivity and necessary item Tracing. In The midst of organizing projects, Transport items to next logical Territories during sensible Transition points to conserve your Time and energy. Toss Things That deplete you or don’t Tastefully enhance your life including Traumatic memory reminders and Toxic relationships you can no longer Tolerate. Track down locations for Textile recycling to dispose Tattered, irreparable clothing and linens. Donate or sell Treasures That still have a useful life. Thirsting for an outfit for a one-off occasion? Try out Thrift shops for frugal, Trendy reuse options or Trade clothes with similar-sized inner circle peeps.
Tick-off completed Tasks to accurately Track what you’ve Tackled. Enjoy That sense of Tangible completion. Finally, Transfer to harmless Temptations to Thank yourself for Tenaciously completing any and all personal or professional Transactions.
Trust in yourself for being The Taskmaster That you are. You’ve Totally got This. And when you don’t, There’s no shame in Therapy. Working Through Triggering Thoughts and Tormenting feelings means you’ll have Tons more resourcefulness for Turbulent or Teary moments with support you’ll need To achieve Transpiring Triumph.
Letter U
U. Understand the Usual and Unusual ways that you Unfold thoughts and actions. Unquestionably tapping into Ultimate strengths and skills will help you Unearth techniques for easier flow and less Uncooperative resistance.
Up against a deadline? Unplug! Use your electronics sparingly. Avoid getting sucked into Unconstructive social media, emails, gaming; Uninvited, Ubiquitous intrusions; and other Uncontrollable Urge temptations. Set aside extra time Upturn obstructions when experiencing Unreliable cognitive moments and Unnatural skill demands. Use Uncomplicated, Utilitarian methods to knock out Uncertain tasks quickly without Unwarranted brain taxation. Make Unexciting routines Ultra-enticing via indulging in Unconventional, creative measures when time and your bandwidth is Unlimited.
Undertake Upcoming Uppermost and Urgent expectations with Utter grace and ease. Understanding ‘U’ will Unearth techniques to move Unimpeded in a variety of Usual and Unusual circumstances minus Unbridled emotions. Image by GrumpyBeere from Pixabay
Are you frequently Unrealistic about the number of tasks you hope to accomplish? Underscore Uppermost and Urgent items. Undertake those first. Afterward, tackle Uncritical to-dos in a manner that makes Undisputed sense to you.
Do you tend to Underestimate execution time? Unexamined time allocation for repetitive jobs can cause you to Unknowingly fall behind. If you’re Uncertain how long processes take, set a timer to track time Usage. Next go around, Upgrade your schedule accordingly. Prone to Undivided hyperfocus? Use audible and visual alerts to transition to Upcoming events. Pad in extra time for Untried processes or driving routes to account for Unplanned hiccups.
Break projects down into manageable Units to prevent Untenable overwhelm.
Do you leave tasks Unfinished to the last minute? Procrastination leads to Unnecessary rushing, Unfocused concentration, and inevitable Unpunctual or Unsatisfactory results. Undoubtedly, it feels Unlikely you’ll Untrain Unbridled habits. Stay Upbeat. Allow yourself to believe that’s Utterly Untrue. Unlearning habits may not Unravel overnight or as Unencumbered as you’d like, change takes time. Unassailable persistence is key.
Rather than bookend your morning to night, Unbook space in your day for restorative personal care and Unscheduled pop-ups.
Uncompromising standards are admirable. There’s a vast difference between Uptight and Untidy. Perfectionism can lead to Undesired traits such as Unenthusiasm; Unhelpful physical and mental stress; and Unpalatable emotions. Routine Upkeep facilitates less freaking out when you need space to spread out, Unwind, or host Unexpected guests. Finding balance will help you achieve objectives with less chance of becoming Unglued.
Uncluttered minds, spaces, and calendars will render Utmost productivity and less confusion. Unorganized spaces impede forward motion and yield Unrewarding searches for Usable surfaces and Unlocatable items. Unimpeded pathways and surfaces enable rapid, safe achievement. Upcycle or repurpose Unneeded items or materials to creatively transform them for Ulterior functions or artistic enjoyment. Unburden yourself and your spaces by releasing Unwanted goods. Unhealthy self-care practices are depleting and eventually stop you cold. An Unwavering commitment to Uplifting, dedicated mind-body rituals, even a few minutes a day, will go a long way to avoiding Upsetting setbacks.
Never Undervalue all that you bring to the table. Unconditional appreciation for who you are and all your Undeniable attributes will serve you Ultra-well.
Vast wisdom is Validated by the letter ‘V’. Venture through these Vital Vittles to Valiantly add Value to your daily Vitae.
Modified image curated from Pixabay
Letter V
V. Value your people, time, home, profession, friendships, communities, Virtues, beliefs, hobbies, passions, and belongings, anything serving purpose for you. Voraciously release Viciously unhelpful thoughts, items, and even people, all the Venomous things that compromise your inherent or craved Vivaciousness. Vast Volumes of stuff, useful or not, require more time, space, patience, and cognitive resourcefulness to manage. Use Vertical storage options to keep surfaces free for ready use.
Curate Visible and Virtual reminders to alert you to upcoming appointments and tasks. Stay mindful of Violating Vested desires for aesthetic and calming Vicinities.
Valiant efforts lead to more Victories. Vector your to-dos according to your Circadian Rhythms to maximize cerebral focus and take advantage of physical Vigor. Seek and activate Variety when dull routines Vaporize your motivation and Viability to move forward. There’s nothing Vapid or weak in requesting assistance on this Voyage through life. Vocalize your needs when an extra set of eyes, ears, or hands will Vitalize your footing and Vanquish Vexing hurdles. Volatile times require Voluminous amounts of patience and grace for yourself and others. Take a Vested interest in restorative downtime. Vacations and Visits to View serene, beautiful Vistas are Valuable Verve resets.
Vary your sitting vs standing and hunching activities to Void strains on your body or prolonged, Vegetative physical inactivity. Vital momentary movement, concerted breathing, hydrating, and nourishing refreshers can provide greater Vibrancy and enduring Vim as opposed to Valorously pushing through when tired or Virulently aggravated.
Volunteer if you have the time and bandwidth as a service to yourself and the greater good. Draw upon skills from your Vocational endeavors. Tap into Virtuous interests that feed your soul.
Validate your self-worth, especially when you’re at your most Vulnerable. You’ve Ventured this far. You must be doing something Verifiably correct.
Witness all the Wonderfully Wise tips from the letter ‘W’ this Week. Watch for and use the Workables ones, Warehouse Worthwhile ideas for the future, and Welcome any and all Wins along the Way.
Image by JL G from Pixabay
W. Wake up and Waft out of bed ahead of schedule, if Well-rested. Time padding provides Wiggle room to prevent added stress When things go Wonky ultimately Waylaying your plans. Weave in early morning, mid-day, or evening Walks or other forms of exercise and meditation to reinvigorate your Wherewithal as your energy Whittles away.
Withhold space on your calendar for unforeseen Wildfires, longer than expected Wait times, and Wellness refreshers.
Wipe your slate clean at the end of each Workday to start fresh every morning. Whisk away piles from your Workspace before you Wander away for the night. Where does it make sense to temporarily or permanently store items? Set aside a logical place in your Workstation to file the papers and objects in a Way that Will simplify retrieval. Wisely Weigh Whether to retain documents. Warehouse critical documents in a fire proof/Waterproof safe or safety deposit box. Warning: fire and Waterproof designations aren’t Without risks. Research options before purchasing to ensure Well-built degrees of protection.
No need to Waste time, space, brainpower, energy, and Well-earned money maintaining Worn-out, Widespread, Worthless clutter. Watch for personal information (social security and credit card numbers) before tossing debris. Shredding is Wiser to protect your identity. Recycle Wastepaper. Toss plastic-coated or embellished docs into the Wastebasket if they can’t be repurposed.
Wean yourself off Wage-draining Websites. Reserve your budget for Worthwhile purchases.
Put your Walls to Work for displaying visible reminders and Wall-mounted file organizers.
Whistle through preparation for Weekend guests with daily tidying. Keep your Wardrobe ready for scheduled or unplanned events via Weekly laundry Washing. Weekly grocery runs will keep your fridge and pantry Well-endowed with readily available nutritious selections.
Estate planning is Worth your attention. Create a Living Will and Estate Will or Trust to communicate and ensure your Wishes are followed, identify Which actions to take on your behalf, and prevent Wrongful misdirections. If legal Writing isn’t in your Wheelhouse, find a reputable Estate Attorney to Wordsmith the documents for you.
Well-managed Work-ethics are Wonderfully Worthy traits. Wicked headaches, Wonky knees, Wishy-Washy brain, and Weathering any Weird ailments Will slow you down or knock you out of the game. Listen to your inner Wisdom. Be Wary about Workaholic tendencies and Wrestling with one more thing. Find a Work-around. Give yourself a Waiver to take it a bit easier.
Witness your big and Wee Wins at the end of each day to rejuvenate your Willpower and Well-intentioned motivation to Whip through to-dos again tomorrow.
Wakefully Watch for Welcoming opportunities to Whatever your heart desires, Wherever your compass directs, Whenever you want to move forward. Your Well-balanced Welfare is the key to ensuring Wholesome Wellbeing. Waive off Woeful commitments Wielding Warrantless stress.
Be fleXible. EXperiment freely to eXtract techniques that work for you. EXamine how the letter 'X' can eXpand your eXpertise, maXimize efficiency, and eXpediently knock out tasks.
Image by Lumpi from Pixabay
Letter X
X. 'Xtra TLC is 'Xactly what you need to eXpel toXins from your body and mind during eXtraordinary periods of high stress. EXcuse yourself from eXtraneous commitments when eXhausted. EXcessiveness in spaces and calendars can lead to debilitating anXiousness.
Be fleXible. EXperiment freely to eXtract techniques that work for you. EXclude ineXpedient processes and activities that aren’t useful or eXcite you. IndeXation will maXimize efficiency to help you remember what you’ve tried, what you like, and what needs fiXing or tossing.
Trust in your eXperience and eXceptional wisdom when life, your surroundings, or your relationships become eXasperatingly compleX. Lean into your eXclusive eXpertise to eXpediently knock out tasks so you can get on to the neXt thing.
Then treat yourself to whatever form of luXury feeds your heart and soul as long as eXpenditures are within your budget. EXtravagance isn’t eXplicitly eXpensive. Take an eXtended walk on the beach or an eXcursion through a local park. EXercise and oXygen replenishment are deluXe ways to eXtinguish overanXious emotions from your brain’s limbic system and return to the more rational cerebral corteX region. Focus on your eXhales as eXtensively as your inhales. RelaX in a tub as you listen to soothing music. Refrain from eXposing yourself to chatterboXes or news programs eXplicitly eXpressing obnoXious eXtremist views if you’re prone to eXplosive tension apopleXy.
PerpleXed introverts can benefit from occasional miXers with EXtraverts. CoaX yourself toward conteXtual community for anti-anXiety and reassurance support. Seek group eXchanges to help rebuild emotional deXterity when a refleXive boost is much needed.
View yourself as a moXie eXplorer eXcavating for less taXing routes to get you from point A to B. Moderate eXpectations. No need for eXacting standards if that leads to fiXacting or veXation. The eliXir is most often found in unseXy simplicity.
YaY! OnlY 2 letters remain on the A to Z organizing and lifestYle skill-building journeY. Letter ‘Y’ is Your ticket to Yielding more Yummy, less Yucky pathwaYs.
Image by Andreas Grönberg from Pixabay
Letter Y
Y. You can do the things for which You Yearn. Yes, have Yea-sayer confidence in Yourself and Your abilities. Yoyoing Yuckiness is likelY initiallY as You dip Your toes into new situations and build new skills. In time, You’ll achieve emotional and experiential Yareness. Yield to the support of others when You’re consumed by untenable Yips. Yeah, theY happen to even the best athletes and other skilled professionals. Avoid measuring Yourself or Your performance bY harsh, unrealistic Yardsticks.
Assess the things left undone Yesterday. What do You need to Yank to the top of the list? Yarely address those tasks then assess what needs to be done afterward.
Yawning or Yelling incessantlY? Listen to Your inner guidance. Find time to treat Your Yelping body and mind to Yummy rejuvenation. TrY Yoga or meditation to restore vital Yin/Yan balance so that You remain Young-at-heart and soul.
Yippee, we’re almost at the end of the A to Z organizing and lifestyle techniques. See You next week for our final installment. Yay!
We’ve made it to this series’ endZone. Along the way, we Zigged and we Zagged letter by letter from generaliZed to specialiZed organiZing techniques and lifestyle recommendations. I’ve shared Zippy tidbits to achieve more with less Zerk out anxiousness. Read on to seiZe the last installment itemiZation.
Image by Betty Verheij from Pixabay
Letter Z
Z. We’ve made it to this series’ endZone. Along the way, we Zigged and we Zagged letter by letter from generaliZed to specialiZed organiZing techniques and lifestyle recommendations. I’ve shared Zippy tidbits to achieve more with less Zerk out anxiousness.
Everyday, you face Zingers from your boss, your partner, your mom, your friend, a stranger in the grocery store, and tech glitches inevitably Zapping your physical and mental reserves. Some days you’ll be too Zonked to get out of bed. Rather than agoniZe and antagoniZe, EmpathiZe. Listen to your body. Your physical and mental health may need a reset laZy snooZe day.
You’ll face tasks that hover outside your skill Zones. Zillions of things were once new to you. Over time you familiariZed becoming a Zealous master of most and daZZling yourself and others with an assortment of priZed proficiencies. Do you acknowledge how often you blitZ through doZens of minor details each day? How deftly you navigate complex maZes that demoraliZe others?
StrategiZe with curiosity and flexibility to get things done in a breeZy way that matches who you are and your cognitive processing and abilities. FragmentiZe bigger projects to vaporiZe fraZZle tendencies. NormaliZe the steps into workable actions. Then standardiZe the process for efficient repetition. MinimiZe overwhelm in your spaces, calendar, and life to make decisions and tasks faster, easier. MaximiZe time spent doing actions you enjoy with harmoniZing people who enrich the experience.
And, yes, there will be times you end up with Zilch. That’s the craZiness of life. How do you rationaliZe when your plans fiZZle? AnalyZe what needs to get done now, soon, or eventually. ConceptualiZe next steps. CategoriZe your tasks and organiZe objects in a way that makes sense for your allotted time, space, bandwidth, and urgency. MobiliZe needed supplies. Zip through the easy stuff then Zoom in on the necessary actions once your physical and/or cognitive Zest is restored. Zero in on what makes you happy and rejuvenates your Zeal. CapitaliZe time there and enjoy the heck out of it. DesensitiZe yourself to the unappetiZing sounds, smells, opinions that drag you down in order to optimiZe your priZewinning output.
Hopefully there are some helpful take-aways from this list so that the next time you’re quiZZical about where or how to deal with organiZing dilemmas, the puZZle solution will be as easy as alpha through Zeta.
Don’t Waste Chances…Emergency Prep During Quieter Moments
If there’s nothing else that I learned from 2 power outages during the last week, the most vital is not to waste opportunities. I run conservative in my eco-practices. Only turn on the dishwasher when I can’t possibly squeeze another implement or dish inside. I toss a load of laundry when the dirty laundry baskets are mostly full or clean undies are at a premium. Scooting to the grocery store when my schedule permits and critical items are getting low or already used up. Today, I’m rethinking my modus operandi. Yes, I still want to be a mindful of my environmental impact. I also need to be more conscious about pending weather events. Twice I intended to run the dishwasher by the end of the day, twice that didn’t happen. Once the first black-out hit last Saturday, our full dishwasher sat for nearly 4 days as the odor became more unpleasant. When nothing else could be squeezed inside, we hand washed after each new use.
Fortunately, the second blackout only lasted roughly 30+ hours. The moment the power came back on, I pressed the dishwasher start button, and threw in a “whites” undies load. The next morning, linens were cleaned. The day after that another washer load with the remainder of our clothes. As soon as roads were passable, we beelined to the grocery store. There was an intermittent trip to a nearby smaller market between storms for emergency items that could be cooked via the gas range along with fruit, breads, and quick snacks.
In sum, here are my suggestions for saving yourself from extra, undue stressors during troublesome times.
Before bad weather hits, make a grocery run while you can and shelves are still stocked
Run at least an essentials load of laundry so you have clean underwear, jeans, tops, sweaters, and even linens (pillowcases, sheets, face towels) during extended power outages. Image by M W from Pixabay
There are probably many more things I could list from what we learned about getting ourselves through frigid temps during no electricity events. I think this list is a good place to start for now. The bottom line is do what you can do when you can do it. Putting vital to-dos off for another time, a different day may not work to your advantage and lead to moments of regret. Sure did for me. For more practical emergency prep tips visit this link.
Avoid an Emo Breakdown…Take a Break From Breaking News
Earlier this week, there I was, at a meeting, apparently not in my best form. A colleague could tell I was out of sorts. We later talked about it. She noted that my usual chipper mood (the façade she typically sees) was dark and unanimated. Not all that uncommon in my personal life, but I concertedly make an effort to conceal the gloomies professionally.
Oddly, I had no impression how I was coming across. When she asked if I was ok, I chalked up my internal darkness to the lingering, rainy darkness outside and waking up on the wrong side of the bed. Upon further reflection, I recalled that I actually awoke feeling good, energized, and plowed right into my morning exercise. The podcast I listened to was engrossingly informative. My husband was away, so the house had been quiet. Weird.
Where and when did my emotions go sideways?
It’s understandably hard to not “be in the know.” It’s often harder to course correct when breaking news takes an emotional toll. Choose your news viewing wisely.
Where did my emotions go sideways? Aha, I made the mistake of turning on the news while making breakfast. I’ve written previously about the consequences of witnessing news reports. I’ve recommended to clients that they avoid watching, listening to, and reading the news. Many of them are prone to depressive and anxious tendencies which shut them down temporarily, and for some, the spin-out can last days. For me, that bleak day happened prior to the Lewiston, Maine shootings. There was already enough violence and trauma in every news segment, enough to shift perkiness to undetected despair in a matter of minutes. So interesting that she picked up on it, and I was living it without realization.
I totally get that we don’t wish to appear ignorant about what’s going on in the world around us. Hearing others talk about this or that, leaves us feeling left out, wobbly, uneducated.
What’s Going on Around Here?
Not quite as obscure as finding the Palau Embassy, this little boy liked the brightly-colored Kenyan Embassy signage.
In 2012, my son and I visited Washington, DC. Unlike most first time tourists, he had no interest in seeing the monuments, government buildings, or any other typical DC landmarks. His goal was to visit nearly all the embassies in the city. That wasn’t an easy task, but we checked out many and photographed him next to signs and flags of the most obscure finds such as the Embassy of Palau. As we walked the city blocks, we began noticing what appeared to be mass evacuations from embassy buildings. At first we wondered if they shared common fire drill days. That didn’t seem to be the case. Our next thought was terrorism threats. We opted to steer away from embassies for a while, and grab a drink at a coffee shop to rehydrate in the humid summer heat. We overheard a couple talking about an earthquake. Then the customer in front of us began a conversation with the barista about an earthquake. Now we were getting concerned. Did the big one hit the west coast? We were over 2000 miles away from home. Was our house still standing? My husband was in China on business, so I tried texting my neighbor. No response.
How Was That Even Possible?
Finally, when I got to the counter, after placing our orders, I asked about the earthquake. He looked at me puzzled, was I being an imbecile? What was I missing here? No I hadn’t been listening to the news, so if the west coast was now in the Pacific Ocean, I truly had no idea. I was beginning to feel insecurely dumb. He asked, didn’t you feel it? Feel what? The earthquake that was centered not all that far from DC. Weirdly, later I learned that my parents in northern NJ felt it. My son and I who had been out walking all day hadn’t felt a thing, and we were much closer to the epicenter.
Apparently, our experience wasn’t unusual. If you’re not in a building, you won’t notice moving and shaking. We were trekking at a good pace, so we didn’t feel the ground shifting. Wow, such an odd phenomenon. It felt disconcerting that everyone around us seemed to be in the know, except us. And, had the circumstances called for sheltering, I hoped there would have been some type of sirens or alerts on our phones to let us to know to seek safety.
Get the FEMA App
FEMA, the Federal Emergency Management Agency, offers authorized emergency cell phone messages ranging from Federal down to local, tribal, and territorial authorities to alert you to natural and human-caused disasters. Since then, I installed the FEMA App. I’ve received few alerts, mostly Amber alerts, but it’s comforting to know that it’s there if needed.
Slowly Wean Yourself from Unwarranted Trauma
Play around with slowly weaning yourself from the news, it’s filled with unnecessary trauma. Like passing a tragic road accident, you don’t have to look. You might see something you can’t unsee. I used to tune into the news while making breakfast and dinner. Then opted for once a day. Now, I will go a day or two without. I have my browser set to a blank screen, so I don’t catch the news on my PC either. Occasionally, I will catch a breaking story on social media. Right now that’s my way of capturing photos of my daughter and son-in-law’s honeymoon. The quickest way to kill a vicarious travel thrill is to witness accounts of a random shooting spree. Sigh.
If You Can't Resist the Urge
If you opt to tune into TV news or scout for news stories online, I’d recommend being mindful about the time of day. If you’re needing to be on your ‘A’ game for the day, avoid current events first thing in your day. Your entire day can be thrown off. Watching the news prior to bed can heighten your stress levels, cause difficulty in falling asleep or disturbances returning to sleep should you awaken during the night. Mid-day might be a better time, but schedule a mindless activity immediately afterward so you can reshift your focus into something more alluring than dwelling on crises. Or take 15 minutes for a quick meditation or exercise routine to release pent up emotions in a constructive(ish) way.
Remedies for My Hurting Brain
With all of the intensity going on worldwide, my brain hurts. Hurts enough that nearly every word I’ve typed has been misspelled. It’s swirling, spiraling, and needing relief. So, I will go take a shower. Do 15 minutes of Qi Gong (a mood uplifter for sure), then reset myself for the day while also making a conscious choice to avoid the news, for now. (‘Now’ was spelled nwo, arrghh). Obviously my brain needs some TLC. Ta ta.
This level of organization may be just right for you. Or not. Either way that’s ok. You decide. Image by Pexels from Pixabay
I have lots of answers…are they "best" for you?
Not long ago, I received a request to contribute to an article about “best” organizing practices. How do I answer that? The majority of my clients need my services as a result of what some classify as “neurodivergent” traits. Without getting too technical, neurodivergent traits are those brain processing attributes that diverge from the way a “typical” brain processes. As if ‘typical’ actually exists. Nevertheless, for those contending with exceptional brain wiring and processing difficulties, their experience is real and challenging.
Most of my clients have been diagnosed with or strongly suspect ADHD. The majority of them struggle with other co-existing brain-based challenges such as depression, anxiety, Asperger's, and/or bi-polar syndrome. It’s not uncommon for them to have a string of physical ailments to boot which impede their ability to accomplish certain tasks without assistance.
Best organizing practices for someone who is grappling with neurological or developmental conditions that interfere with daily functioning and chronically challenged by executive function weaknesses, the main culprit behind ADHD, in all likelihood will be quite different from what US society defines as the neurotypical methods. Executive function skills, which emanate from the brain’s prefrontal cortex, govern organization capabilities. Therefore, weakness or less than optimal (for that person) executive function correlates to difficulties (organizing or otherwise) in one or multiple cognitive areas. Time perception & time management; memory skills; impulsivity; planning and prioritization; motivational levels along with the ability to self-motivate; problem-solving; emotional regulation; and possibly interpersonal communications and relationships can precipitate capacity to get and stay organized if robust or impede abilities if wobbly.
The bottom line is that readers falling within neurotypical designations are theoretically less likely to need organizing adjustments beyond object arrangement ideas and disposal resources. I acknowledge that’s a highly generalized theory perhaps, but on the whole, that population isn’t coping with executive function dysfunctions that consistently hamper organization aspirations.
Rather than list a bunch of tools that may or may not apply to both types of audiences, I opted for a bird’s eye holistic approach to home and lifestyle organizing. My client outcomes tend to be more successful when we tune into each person’s uniqueness. Therefore, “best” is a relative term.
Let’s Dial Down
Let’s dial down to see how this might apply directly to you and your objectives. What does it mean to be organized within your own world? What are your specific needs? What do you or other household members hope to get out of reinventing your living spaces, calendars, task initiation or completion? What’s realistic for you? Unless the process makes sense to you and you commit to embrace it, a new direction stands little chance of sustainment. Where and how do we begin to move forward regardless of brain type?
Orient to What You Want
Start with the overall ‘what’. What do you really want? If you don’t need or want to get organized, no worries. If you’re thinking bring it on, then I suggest you ascertain the big picture first, then zoom into specifics. Frequently, we bog down in details before deciding what we hope to get out of it. Next we get frustrated by minutia overwhelm. Eventually, we give up before we get any further. No need to rush unless you’re up against a deadline. Give it time to percolate.
What areas of your life could benefit from improvement? Is it space, time, finances, relationships or possibly a combination of these? If you look at interior design TV programs thinking, “that’s what I want my house to look like”, groovy. Keep in mind, Hollywood can make anything happen at any price with lots of folks behind the scenes. Is it realistic for you, your time, skills, environment, supportive network, and budgetary constraints? Strive to keep it real. Otherwise, that staged scene will look more like shattered pixels and deflated hopes before you get far. Once you understand the big picture, narrow down further and further until the job feels manageable for your abilities, time, energy, and potentially budget. Aim for a corner of a desk vs an entire room for a less overwhelming place to start.
Surrender Lead Balloons
2. What specifically isn’t working? Do you have more objects than space to store them? If your living quarters are tight, find extraneous items, the lead balloons, that you no longer use, need, or like. Donate, gift, sell, or recycle those to create more room for your essentials and treasures.
Try looking at your home from a fresh perspective to find imperceptible storage options. Storage doesn’t necessarily have to be a closet, cabinet, or shelf. Consult a neutral observer such as a professional organizer for space optimization ideas if you’re stuck. I worked with a client whose apartment had virtually no storage. Placing 2 bookshelf partitions on opposing walls to the rear of a 9x12 room created a private office nook, concealing large objects such as tents and skis that had nowhere else to reside. The partition shelves provided extra storage for books, kitchen gadgets housed in decorative baskets, hobby supplies, and other miscellaneous items. Hooks and hanging rods were installed on each of the concealed walls to stow clothes and coats.
Suppose “item-release” decisions are beyond your emotional capacity? Turn to your support network: a friend, family member or a non-invested soul to help you analyze what’s important to you and what’s not. Allowing them to handle each object will thwart a “sympathetic response”. What is a sympathetic response? Memories or emotions may trigger as you touch or hold the object. Kinesthetic or tactile processors, individuals who predominantly process through touching, feeling, doing, are reportedly more predisposed to experiencing a sympathetic response. Depending upon the response sensation or magnitude, your feelings about that item could shift from “I can get rid of that” to “I better keep it.” Spare the stress. If you don’t touch it, you’re less likely to respond to it. Resist the urge.
This trajectory may make sense to you. Or not. Honor your uniqueness. Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay
Build on Triumphs
3. What’s working? Build upon successes. If you’re strategic at time management in your profession, but not so much at home, is there a calendar system that keeps you on track in the office? Could it be modified for home use? Is accountability something that motivates you? Then buddy up. Find a pal who also wishes to plow through their to-do list. Support each other while on a phone or video call, then celebrate your wins afterward.
Take note of any rewards or inducements that have worked in the past. Continue to use the beneficial incentives, and dispose of the duds or previous winners that no longer help. Be open to continually pocketing appealing reward methods if you’re prone to easily getting bored or seek innovative stimulation. It’s important for impulsive types to be mindful of reward types. Draining your budget with expensive rewards or compromising your dietary goals is likely to lead to disharmony rather than effectively celebrating task completion and organizing successes. Sometimes accomplishment is a reward in itself.
Recognizing your own bandwidth size is crucial. Take breaks or piece-meal your projects to prevent burnout, to sidestep physical and emotional breakdowns, and to stay within allotted available scheduled timeframes. Turn to tried & true methods to keep your scheduling on track, or explore new techniques until you fall into a temporary or possibly permanent groove.
Rather than resist rest, exercise, or replenishment breaks, physical and emo recharges can reset your stamina when you find focus and motivation deteriorating. When you’re stuck, walk away for 5-7 minutes. You might see challenges from a revised doable perspective.
Often my clients have difficulty extrapolating successes from one area of their life to other seemingly unrelated circumstances. To go a step further, they also tend to overlook successes period. Admirably, they’re highly creative but inhibited by fears and past bloopers. Look for opportunities in all aspects of your life for methods leading to getting things done faster or with more ease. Notice when your efforts garnered positive feedback. Dig into activities that fuel your passion and motivation. What facets, even if miniscule, can you borrow and apply to more onerous or uninteresting tasks in order to check it off your list?
Be curious, creative, and resourceful. Experiment without judgment. Apply “good enough” when appropriate vs getting bogged down in perfectionism. You’ll be on your way to “best” organizing practices as they apply to your unique world.
Sock Frenzy
Just because I’m a professional organizer doesn’t mean my brain doesn’t get confused, A LOT. That’s why I need to keep my spaces clutter-free because my brain is prone to spiraling. Fortunately, I’m able to call upon my organizational skills to help me create methods to get passed some of the sticky points.
Does your brain get scrambled when tackling the laundry? For the most part, I’m ok depending on how busy I am. The busier my schedule, the more flustered my brain can become. Socks are the thing that can whip my neurons into a frenzy. So years ago, I tried to make post-drying sorting as easy as possible. Rather them dump all the laundered socks into a pile, I avoid visual overload by doing the following:
Boom, that’s it.
My socks are stored in my dresser, divided by color. I’ve repurposed cardboard dividers previously used in wine stem boxes. Having the socks stored this way makes it super easy to quickly grab socks in the dark in case I have to get dressed while my husband is still asleep.
At it over 2 hours, still more panels awaiting. Sigh.
Last week I wrote a tip about my struggles motivating myself to complete an annual cleaning ritual. I could have let it go, but the task gnawed away each time I saw a cloud of dust erupt as I opened the curtains if the sun hit just at the right angle. Irritation also happened each night when I re-noticed black spots from some unidentified source on the right-hand living room curtain. If I got no other “spring cleaning” tasks done, I would feel at least somewhat accomplished if this particular chore disappeared from the 2023 to-do list.
As you may have noticed from the photos I posted last week, the task is done except for my son’s bedroom curtains. They’re red. They have to be washed with the color load instead of the pale curtain colors. They’ll be simple to knock out before he visits in 2 weeks.
What I observed I needed, once I got past the lack of motivation, is to address one of my biggest ever-present liabilities: PATIENCE or lack thereof. I’m not an inherently patient person. I like to quickly and efficiently knock out action items. This was no 15-30 minute job. I was knee deep for hours, and I could feel tension rising. Here’s what I did to cope. I intentionally separated the pile, leaving some panels in the laundry room, and taking a few at a time into the living room where I set up the ironing board so as not to get too overwhelmed by how much remained after completing each panel. That helped, a bit.
I did a fairly good job of pacing myself. I was mindful of how the iron seemed to let me know it wanted a break. It wreaked with signs of potential over-heating. I used iron cool-downs as an excuse to take a breather. I skipped off to attend a mid-afternoon meeting, and then squeezed in my afternoon walk. Another intermission, I prepared a hearty soup so it would be ready after my early evening conference call, and then knocked out some light dusting before finishing up client notes. Finally I sidled back to the last panel before the con call.
Yes, I needed to re-motivate each time I stepped aside, but it really wasn’t too bad. After my walk, about 15 minutes remained in a podcast, so I used that to start another panel. The rest of the time, I put on mindless TV for background noise and to occasionally glance up at something aside from fabric, but nothing that dangerously distracted my attention. Burns to my body or the fabric would definitely have been de-motivating this year and for years to come.
In total, it took nearly 3 hours to iron all the panels, mostly because the linen material on the bedroom curtains takes prohibitively long. Even damp, which I discovered a few years back aids in speeding up the process, they are still a royal P.I.T.A. Ah, it felt noticeably refreshing to get the cumbersome ones done. Not that any of them were a picnic, but some were definitely less onerous than others.
Thank you again for surreptitiously providing me with the accountability to remove this irritating stressor from my to-dos. Patience is still a work in progress, but I’m definitely tuning into tools to calm that savage beast.
Motivate and Activate When It's Just Not Happening
While this is technically a cleaning tip, I’m including this under ADHD coping tips for a reason. This is intended to tap into motivation and accountability, more specifically my own. A few years ago, I migrated my “spring cleaning” ritual to winter while I’m stuck indoors. Thereby allocating spring time for gardening chores. As part of this ritual, I launder all the washable curtains in my home. That’s been gnawing away on my radar for several weeks now. Taking the panels down is a bit of a bore, but not really a big deal. Neither is tossing them in the washer and dryer. Easy! So where’s the hiccup? Why am I avoiding this particular task? Ironing. There are 6 84” linen panels. They’re incredibly onerous to iron. The two windows with short panels aren’t as dreadful, and fortunately not linen.
For most of us, if something doesn’t float our boat, excite us, or entice us, we’re less likely to put those tasks at the top of our list. Or make the list at all. Add a brain-based challenge like adult ADHD, and every shiny thing will get shinier luring us away from the thing we dread. That’s been my experience at least. Every day, those curtains fall further down the list as I find other actions that are either easier to knock out or are more palatable. Most of which, including the curtains, aren’t exactly important, so relatively speaking, it’s not a “do or die” situation. But I’m a listmaker who thrives on crossing off completed projects. I do want the curtains done. Therefore, y’all are my accountability buddies. I’m using this week’s practical tip to motivate myself to get on a step stool. Grab all the panels. Toss them into the machines. And heat up the iron. Forgive me if I presumed your acquiescence to be part of this process. What’s done is done. Bonus, it gave me an idea for a practical tip which is now completed.
If you find yourself dragging your heels. Avoiding the to-dos with either major or minor resistance, experiment with the following:
Give the steps a whirl. I’d love to know what helps you overcome avoidance to get through dull tasks.
Leave a Light On
In our vernacular, we’ve adopted an expression, “Adult ADHD” to explain away moments of distractibility, frustration, forgetfulness, and veering off track. These are the times you walk into a room to grab something. By the time you get there, you have no idea why you’re in the room. Or, you start on one task, the phone rings, and you’ve completely veered away from where you were prior to the call. As a result, task gets left undone. Sound familiar? Take a breath. Relax your shoulders. Mine creeped up in response to this topic.
Diagnostic Accuracy or Not, the Manifestation is Exasperating
For some, “Adult ADHD” is diagnostically accurate. For others, the term is used loosely as an explanation for age-related forgetfulness, over-scheduling, too much on the plate, or a host of other reasons. I’ve been guilty of using the terminology indiscriminately which I’m aware diminishes the array of challenges for those navigating through life with diagnostic adult attention deficit-hyperactivity disorder (ADHD). Whether you’ve been diagnosed or if you bump up against daily difficulties with distractions that cause you to forget what you were in the midst of doing or what’s next on deck, this simple reminder might help. This coping skill helps me to a degree to keep exasperation at bay.
Turn a light on if you need to remember to return to that room to finish what you were doing or address what’s next on deck.
It's This Simple
Turn a light on. It’s that simple, it may or may not work for you. It may be less effective during daylight hours; if you’re away from an indoor setting where you have control over lighting; if you get waylaid long enough away from where you left the light on; or if someone in your household, aware of your forgetful tendencies, switches the light off. Therefore, this technique may need tweaking. An audio alert, which will require a bit more forethought and time to execute, could be a better solution. My iphone alarm and reminder settings allow me to label the alert; otherwise, I might ditz on what the notification is for.
See if You Can Follow This
Here’s an example of how and why I use this particular reminder. A few days ago in my home office, with 30 spare minutes prior to a client appointment, I noticed my eyeglasses needed cleaning. The glass cleaning cloth is stored in the laundry room. Before washing the glasses in the powder room, I grabbed the cloth. While in the laundry room, I noticed the clean laundry on the drying rack ready to be folded and put away. I didn’t want to forget them after dealing with my glasses, so I left the laundry room light on as I scurried to the powder room. As I washed my glasses, I saw that the soap dispenser was nearly empty.
Now I had 4 things to remember to do:
Refill the soap dispenser.
Return the glass cleaning cloth to the laundry room.
Fold and put away the clothes.
Prepare for my upcoming appointment back in my office.
Before temporarily leaving the powder room to head to the kitchen to refill the soap dispenser (refill bottles reside under the kitchen sink), I switched on the light. Lo and behold, I received a can’t miss return phone call from my doctor, so I ran to my office to fetch my cell phone. This call involved scheduling an appointment, marking it on my wall calendar, adding it to my e-calendar, and awaiting a dual-factor authentication code for the calendar log-in. Before the authentication code arrived, a text popped up. Arrgh, I could feel my brain scrambling to stay focused. I entered the code on my pc, scanned the text in case it was my client (nope), and set up alert reminders for the DR appointment. Now where was I??? Did you lose track? I did. Why is life complicated?
Tactics That Might Work for 5 Minutes or More
I looked down, and I had unknowingly grabbed the glass cleaning cloth on my way to answer my phone as I continued to wipe the drops and streaks on my glasses. That reminded me the cloth needed to be put away. I walked out of my office and noticed the powder room, laundry room, and kitchen lights on. Ah, back to the kitchen to finish refilling the soap dispenser. Return the dispenser to the powder room. Take the glass cloth, head to the laundry room to store it back into the over-the-door pocket storage. Fold the clothes, put away the drying rack, and take the clothes upstairs and place them in my dresser drawer.
I might have remembered some or all of those steps or not. While it might have been a waste of electricity for those 5-10 minutes that those lights were on (fortunately we installed solar panels so I feel a little less guilty), I spared myself the self-recrimination and frustration owing to forgetfulness. Whatever works is truly helpful to keep on track. I’m a work in progress. I continually refine because some tactics are effective, some not so much. Some things works for a while, then eventually need adjustment or tossing. Think of it as an exploratory game. That helps to keep the irritation levels at bay (a bit).
Surefire Organizing SNAFU
If you want to guarantee that your organizing project will go sideways…plan to do the whole shebang all at once. I take that back. If it’s a small job that can reasonably be completed in a few minutes, hours, or even a day, go for it, if it won’t freak you out. Keep this in mind, one thing leads to another. What do I mean by that? Ask anyone who tried organizing a minor area such as a linen closet and it took them half a day or longer. They wanted more room for extra blankets, sheets, pillow cases, and pillows. No longer were the blender, coffee maker, and printer supplies welcome. Easy accessibility for those items in the rooms where they would likely be used like the kitchen or office was the goal. But currently there’s no spare storage in those rooms. It’s like the chicken and the egg, an endless cycle of what goes first?
Linen closet in need of TLC
Before you start, it’s helpful to know that clearing out any area or room will lead to needing storage elsewhere for relocated objects. That is, unless you plan to clear out via donation, gifting, selling, or recycling all goods that don’t belong in there.
One option, to manageably and simultaneously create storage space in various rooms, is to hire a professional organizing team. No budget for that? Assign each family member a room to target. However, be wary of frenetic busyness and the weightiness of extra decisions as you get pulled in multiple directions while attempting to focus on your own area.
For those with ADHD or prone to feeling scattered, tame the project as much as possible. Start by scaling expectations. The bigger the expectation, the harder the downfall if it doesn’t work. The smaller the project, the faster the win.
Break the project down into the tiniest, most feasible scope. Pick one area to start such as one corner of a room. Then zoom in further to one piece of furniture such as a desk. Now pick a corner of the desk or one drawer. Start there. You can always go bigger as time, energy, and focus permit.
Label boxes and bins with the corresponding destination so it’s clear what goes where, and you won’t need to continually stop to identify the box’s contents or landing place. Categories might be: primary bedroom, bathroom, living room, kitchen, attic, garage, donation center, recycling, trash, the kids, my friends, my aunt, whatever makes sense for your circumstances. Rather than run from room to room, fill the boxes. When the boxes are full or you run out of time or energy, temporarily stack them safely until you have the opportunity to clear out storage space or you have more time to resume.
Keep stacks to a safe height (waist to chest high) to avoid toppling and maintain clear passageways. Stop when you’ve reached maximum safe temporary storage capacity. If it makes sense, deliver room designated boxes to their next destination. This will allow you to assess how much storage space you will need there, and to slowly begin putting things away as space allows. Think about placing filled boxes for external delivery (donation or recycling center) in your car.
Move on to another area or room step by step. There are no rules. If you like to mix it up by doing a little here and there, give it a go. Progress is progress no matter how you got there. If the process doesn’t seem to be working well, try something different. Ask for a hand, someone to run boxes while you fill up more. Having a co-pilot will make the job go quicker and is usually more fun with a person suitable as your side-kick.
A Rapid Reset When Your Mind is Spinning and Your Body is Tense
Admittedly, this reset will be super tough for someone whose mind is spinning wildly and agitation is high. Try an adult time-out. It’s worth a shot to get your body and brain settled. It’s hard to think clearly, speak coherently, act thoughtfully when your mind’s haywire and you’re jumping out of your skin. Get on with your day and accomplish your to-dos with a relatively quick pause. What have you got to lose? If you have an upcoming appointment or limited time, set a timer. The milder the symptoms, the faster this will work. Stick with it until you notice any improvement or until your timer beeps. 2-5 minutes, depending on severity could be just enough to get a reboot.
Find a quiet, relatively comfortable spot where you won’t be bothered by shiny things or other tempting distractions. A stairway for example. Either close your eyes or select something to stare at. If your eyes are open, allow them to remain on the object as you begin to regulate your breathing.
Sit, get comfortable, breathe and notice. Image by Dean Moriarty from Pixabay.
Notice your breaths. Breathe in through the nose, out through your mouth (clogged noses not withstanding). See how long you can extend the inhale and the exhale. As you do, what do you notice? Any scents or fragrances in the air? What’s the air feel like going in and out? Is it cooler or warmer on the inhale or the exhale? Breathe in and out slowly 10 times or until you notice your breathing becomes regular and easy.
Imagine your eyes focusing inside your body now. Scan head to toe. What’s the state of your body? Starting with your head. Is your scalp tight or loose? Your forehead? Your eyes? Neck? Shoulders? Simply notice as you move downward what each area feels like. Tense? Anxious? Relaxed? Calm? Unremarkable? Use your mind to send oxygen to any area that is tight or on edge. Stay with that area until you notice even a slight improvement. Then resume the scan and repeat. When you’ve finished, imagine warm, soothing water cascading over your head down your body washing away all the ickiness.
If you still have time…
With gentle breaths continuing, sense your environment. What do the surfaces around your body feel like? If you’re sitting, does it feel soft under your body? Hard? Rough? Squishy? Is the floor under your feet carpet? Hardwood? Tile? Does it feel cold? Warm? Soft? Hard? What do your clothes feel like on your body? Comforting? Loose? Tight? Soft? Textural? Simply notice your surroundings. Feel them. Each time your mind drifts off, gently bring it back.
What sounds do you hear? People talking? Birds chirping? Dogs barking? Horns beeping? Lawn equipment roaring? Your own breathing? Allow your mind to note each one, then let it go and see what else you pick up.
Sit for another moment or 2. As you do, feel back into your body. Any changes from when you first sat down? If there’s still tension or anxiousness, if you have time, repeat each step. If you feel good, thank yourself for allowing a wellness pause.
Remembering What You Forgot
While this tip is included as an ADHD coping tip, it applies to anyone diverted from their usual routine or needing cues to remember something out of the ordinary. First, a little backstory. My daily walking routine was disrupted after being out of town for an extended period of time. While I was gone, the days grew shorter. Now my walks aren’t always in daylight. It took 3 walks in the dark without my reflective vest, before I realized my mistake. Embarrassingly, it took 2 more dark walks in a deep purple jacket and non-reflective pants before I remembered to grab my vest prior to heading out the door. By day 5, I needed to do 2 things:
During the cold months, this isn’t normally an issue because I keep the vest in the coat closet. I see it when I grab my coat, or I hang it directly on that hanger. But remembering it now, after being out of the walking routine, still warm temps, and shorter hours of daylight has been a challenge.
How did I successfully manage this transition? And I finally did.
Yay, I finally remembered my reflective vest.
I have to admit breaking back into a routine or habit isn’t always a cinch. First you have to realize that something is different. What changed? What caused the change? Do you want to reinvoke the habit? How do you return to the routine or perhaps make it even better?
There are no rules. Play around with it. Give yourself some leeway to goof up along the way. I sure did. Fortunately, while heading out without the vest wasn’t the safest way to walk in the dark, my white sneakers probably were enough to help be seen, and I got through the first week without incident. And yes, once I realized that the vest was missing again on the second day of awareness (by now day 5 in the dark), I silently admonished myself for forgetting again. No, I take that back, come to think of it, I did bitch to my husband, “dang I forgot it again!”. Coincidentally, while this tip was awaiting publication, my dentist said remembering her reflective vest has been troublesome for her too. I told her, “I have a tip for you!”
But now the routine is reestablished. I’m not likely to forget it again, at least until there’s a routine disruption. If so, I will tinker around to get me back on track.
When Learning Isn’t Your Thing
Do you despise learning? Is despise is too strong? Do details bore you? Do you shut down because it’s one more thing you have to remember and likely to forget? It’s much easier to dive fast and deep into topics or activities that we have a passion for, anything else leaves us susceptible to turning off before tuning in.
Before you freak out or close down, here are some ideas for less intimidating ways to assimilate new material. There are also a few suggestions for coping in environments when you feel out of your element.
1. Make it a game.
That’s hard to do when information is data laden: dates, names, formulas, seemingly useless minutia. In school I struggled to remember facts when studying for tests. Eventually I developed a number of methods to store the data in short term memory until the test was over. For example, if there were lists of definitions, I would fold paper in half lengthwise. On one side of the fold, I wrote the word. After the fold, I wrote the definition either directly across from the word or somewhere else down the page so that I had to match the word and definition. That felt more like a game to me, which made studying easier. Handwriting each word and definition also helped reinforce the particulars.
Occasionally I played “Best the Clock.” After memorizing 4-5 definitions, historical facts, or mathematical properties, I would test myself to see how many questions I could answer before the clock ran out. If a ticking clock or elapsing time stresses you out, I don’t recommend this technique.
2. Practice for reinforcement
I embarrassed myself the first day of my second summer job. I fumbled and bumbled trying to make change via subtraction (math was not my strong suit). When I got home nearly in tears, my mom, a math whiz, taught me a less mathy technique, “build toward the dollar”. If someone hands you a dollar for a .49 cent purchase, a penny will get you to .50 cents. Another 50 cents (2 quarters) renders a dollar. How could it have been that easy? Sigh.
I grabbed household items, gave them prices, then practiced making change for a few days with my mom and my friends until I felt confident. I granted myself a humiliation pass once I realized that this basic life skill was never taught in school. Seriously. My kids aren’t likely to remember, but I taught them the same way.
3. Find something about the learning that interests you
Your friend wants you to join her for a new art exhibition, but museums aren’t your thing. You want to be a good friend. You’d like her to join you when your passions aren’t exactly hers. Go along for a change of scenery. Find something at the venue that sparks your own interests. The colors, the architecture, even people watching. While she pauses at each painting, admire the art physically while your mind wanders. What it would be like to be in that scene? Why did the artist choose those colors? What was she thinking? Without realizing it, you’re picking up on style, color theory, and what it is about the artist or the artwork that interests or repels you.
If none of that works, distract yourself by contemplating after-museum drinks and nibbles. What kind of coffee and treats will you order? Hot on a frigid day, or icey cold on a steamy afternoon? Lattes, espressos, or herbal tea? Sweets, savories, crunchies or custards. If your stomach starts noticeably growling, that’ll give you an excuse to ask her to head out.
Professor Brian Cox, University of Manchester, reflects on “Our Place in the Universe” at the “State of the Universe” Symposium in celebration of the late Professor Stephen Hawking’s 70th birthday party.
In 2017, I had the good fortune to attend the late Professor Stephen Hawking’s 70th birthday party festivities in Cambridge, England. The main component of the celebration was the “State of the Universe” Conference. On the final day of the conference, we were invited to a public symposium hosted by the Centre for Theoretical Cosmology. The program featured the most brilliant minds in cosmology, physics, and astronomy. Gravitational waves, holography and black holes, supernovae. This was an opportunity of a lifetime. Yet, I was way out of my element. At first, I found myself frustrated as my brain tried to keep up. Then I convinced myself to lighten UP! I did. Instead of struggling to comprehend, I lost myself in the videos and graphics, speaker delivery, the excitement of the audience. Once I allowed my brain to relax, my understanding of the concepts was slightly clearer. Slightly.
Pick up what you can. And if you choose to or need to go deeper, find someone to help you walk through it, watch videos on Youtube, or enroll in an intro course for a more elementary approach to the material.
4. Tune into your uniqueness
Do you feel like you learn then have to relearn over and over? That’s not surprising for some ADHD brains and for those who have experienced traumatic brain injury (TBI). Co-vid 19 and chemo medications leave some with long-term brain fog and memory difficulties. Inattentiveness, hyperactive thoughts, brain fog, and injury to the brain understandably cause difficulty processing new information and subsequent memory retention. I get it, it’s frustrating and it takes lots of patience. Sometimes more than we have. I talk about my own brain fog compensation and offer some tips that occasionally work for me in this month’s blog, “Going Nowhere Day After Day: Breaking the Cycle”.
How do you process most effectively? Tune in to how you naturally learn to make assimilating new information and to some degree, retention less onerous. For example, I’m a strong kinesthetic and visual processor. I need to see it, touch it, play around with it, and practice continually otherwise I will forget. If it’s not something amenable to constant practice, create a set of instructions in a way that makes sense for you. For instance, I typed a checklist with photos to walk me step-by-step through fixing a wonky “in-wall tank” toilet valve. It’s infrequent enough that I forget how to take it apart and reassemble it when it needs a readjustment. The next time I have to deal with it, my instructions will be ready. I keep them in a digital household folder, subfolder=bathrooms.
I often recommend the “Talk Show Method”, more commonly known as the Protege Effect. It’s a handy and proven psychological phenomenon to learn and reinforce something new. Pretend you’re a talk show host teaching an audience how to make a recipe, darn a holey sock, create a spreadsheet. Teaching others (even invisible people) “improves your learning process by increasing your metacognitive processing, increasing your use of effective learning strategies, increasing your motivation to learn the material, and increasing your feelings of competence and autonomy”.* Try it, see if it helps.
The next time you need to learn something new for work or complete a household task, think of it as an experiment. Play around until you get the hang of it. Then create a set of instructions with words, photos, hand drawn pictures to break the steps down to avoid freaking out down the road.
*Itamar Shatz, PhD, Effectiviology, The Protégé Effect: How You Can Learn by Teaching Others
Tap into Your Strengths for Greater Success
Do you suspect or have you been diagnosed with ADHD? If ADD/ADHD* applies to you keep reading. If not, you might wish to read on too. Why? To understand family, friends, and coworkers who exhibit ADHD characteristics.
Strengths get lost behind a wall of labels, challenges, diagnoses, and comments from others. The more we get called out on our less positive traits, the more we lose who we really are. We feel bogged down, less motivated, unable to gather clear thoughts, and fearful of trying because we might not succeed. Not much gets done or without lots of bitching and muttering.
Suppose we can tap into our strengths? Select among our personal toolkits to achieve our goals or at least sail more smoothly through daily tasks, work assignments, interpersonal relationships? Wouldn't that be ideal?
As with the Brain Types and Sensory Preferences Assessments that I offer, the more we understand what makes us tick, the easier it is to get us into our zone to reach each finish line with fewer struggles.
Each week for the next several weeks, I will guide you through a strength-based self -assessment. Your answers will provide you with more clarity, operate more efficiently, and motivate you to get started and keep moving toward completion.
Let’s begin by looking at your peak performance time of day. Use these tips to optimize your bio-clock.
What time of day at you at your peak for focus and activity? Are you a(n):
- Early Bird
- Midday Songbird
- Night Owl
Use the suggestions below that correspond to your response.
Image by Claude Mondestin from Pixabay
Early Bird
Early Bird's peak time is prior to noon. Schedule your brain intensive, high capacity work early in the day when your brain and body are at their peak. Use afternoon hours for some regenerative movement/exercise, and less cognitive work. Skip the afternoon caffeine hit to avoid sleep disturbance at night. Instead opt for veggie smoothies or protein packed lunches and snacks. Schedule early dinners to fully digest prior to sleep. Plan a reasonable bed time to ensure you’re ready for early start. As an Early Bird, if you still have work leftover at the close of the day, instead of staying up late, set your alarm for earlier in the morning to squeeze in extra work time. Arise 15-20 minutes early each morning for meditation or exercise prior to launching your day for an energizing start.
Midday Songbird
As mid-day is optimal peak time for you, schedule your brain intensive and high energy tasks for noon to five pm. Use your mornings to catch up on mundance or repetitive tasks, exercise, journaling, or meditation. Ensure that you eat meals that will sustain you through the afternoon such as protein based-meals and snacks to avoid sleepiness as the day goes on, and hydrate frequently. Move around if you feel your energy levels sagging. Use early evenings for exercise if mornings don't work for your schedule.
Image by Erik Karits from Pixabay
Late nights are your thing. Night Owls fall prey to losing themselves in work or play resulting in wee hour bedtime. Early morning meetings will not highlight your best thoughts and talents unless you manage to squeeze in deep, restorative sleep. Plan to forego intentional late nights when days start earlier than you prefer. Set your alarm 15-20 minutes prior to the time you need to arise to build in extra time to get your brain and body moving without feeling rushed and overwhelmed. Prepare a high potency smoothie before bed to grab in the morning in lieu of or in addition to your caffeine fix. Add some protein for an extra energy punch. By midday, late-nighters often feel an energy drain before rebounding through the night. Allow time in your post-noon schedule for a 20 minute nap, a protein snack and lots of hydration, and movement to get you over the hump.
2. Pacing
When working or tackling chores would you describe yourself as a:
- Sprinter (get it done quickly and move on)
- Miler (pace yourself slow and steady)
- Marathoner (go the distance, keep on working long hours to get the job done)
- Dabbler (do a little bit, take a break, move on to something else, come back with continuous switching it up)
Sprinters have their eyes on the finish line. Image by Keith Johnston from Pixabay
Sprinter
Sprinters have their eyes on the finish line. They typically enjoy crossing items off the to-do list. Those awaiting product delivery from you appreciate your attention to deadlines. However, carelessness can result from speeding along. Rushing causes do-overs or unwelcome feedback. You might wish to double check your work or ask a neutral party to review for glaring mistakes. Slowing down is obvious but not alway possible with a spinning brain and energetic body. Build in times to pause here and there for a refreshed perspective.
Image by Melk Hagelslag from Pixabay
Miler
Milers' deliberateness and steadiness helps to keep emotions in check and avoid burnout In order to operate most effectively, ensure that you plan for busy times or unexpected demands so that you can continue at your pace.
Pace yourself Marathoners for better performance and burnout avoidance. Image by tookapic from Pixabay
Marathoners, are you prone to procrastination? Waiting too long to start then pounding away under the crunch of a deadline? The reasons for stalling may vary. Lack of motivation, overflowing schedules, or the dopamine hit of last minute urgency. If you find that this is burning you out, pause to take notice of patterns. What is getting in the way of pacing yourself? Use some of the tips for night owl, procrastinator, and internal drivers to get you to the finish line with less stress and dread.
Dabblers tune into stop-start patterns. Are they helpful or hindrance? Use this awareness to guide your decisions and actions. Image by Mike Foster from Pixabay
Dabbler
Dabblers it might be worth noting if attention deficit contributes to your stop-start patterns. Tune into to what's behind that to guide your decision-making and actions. Randomly switching from one task to another can disrupt flow. A little bit here, a little attention there. If fleeting attention gets in the way, an ADHD evaluation and strategies might be helpful for you. On the flip side, if the redirection is due to your awareness of shifting energy and focus needs, then kudos for tuning in.
*Note: Back in 1987, ADD was enveloped into ADHD in the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual (DSM) definition.
Getting tasks started is often more than half the battle. Use your strengths for task initiation through to completion. Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay.
Select the method(s) you currently use to cue action.
A. Set audible and/or visual alerts and timers.
B. Play it by ear.
C. React mostly to urgent or immediate requests.
D. Rely on routines and habits.
Tune into your action stimulators. What works? What could use improvement? Chances are you use a mix of A-D. Are some more useful than others? Do circumstances dictate your response mode? Do professional expectations have more immediate and potent triggers than household chores? Some responsibilities carry more weight or have greater significance. It’s easier to wrap your head around an action or how you will tackle it, if you have the agency and personal toolkit to do so. You may have your own cues that are not listed here. If they work, keep on keeping on. If not, experiment until you find the magic formula. Even magic formulas may need adjustment over time.
Time Timers are a visual and auditory asset for letting you know how much time has passed and the amount of time remaining.
A. Alerts
Alerts and timers are a fantastic way to stay on schedule, get you out of your chair to take a refresher break, and to remind you to move about to benefit your circulation, your body and your mind. Ensure that the volume is loud enough to hear. Visual and auditory alarms such as The Time Timer let you know, at a rapid glance, how much time you have before you need to move on to the next thing. To avoid interrupting others, place your phone in your pocket and use the vibrate option. Alarms, beeps, and noises can be annoying when they impede creativity flow. Set alerts to something you’ll appreciate hearing. Keep in mind, even if annoying, the notification will benefit you in the long run.
Use whatever type of list or doodle works for your brain. Image by 18706286 from Pixabay
B. Play By Ear
Playing it by ear is a relaxed way to approach your to-dos. For those items that are not time-sensitive or have serious repercussions if forgotten or not completed, then no worries. Do what comes naturally. However, if “winging-it” has not worked well for you, you may need better orchestration. Create whatever type of list works for you. Doodles, scheduled alerts on your phone, or a list of 2-3 critical items adhered to your computer screen or bathroom mirror (use something that doesn’t leave sticky residue). Whatever works for you as a non-irritating reminder is better than nothing.
C. Urgent & Immediate Requests
Responding to urgent or immediate requests is a fact of life no matter how well we plan. My March blog, Leading a Double Life, reflects on how even the most organized people can get sidelined by urgent, unexpected assignments. The most useful way to prepare is to be prepared. That means, simplifying, attaining a manageable level daily organization, and taking care of all the time-critical tasks as reasonably as you can. At least you’ll have those well in hand if you get in a crunch. Review the future planning preparations suggested in the blog to ensure that you’re covered for major life events when life goes sideways.
D. Routines & Habits
Relying on routines and habits may seem boring to those with ADHD or other brain-based conditions. However, if your brain feels overtaxed most of the time, then routines and habits give the brain less to plan and manage. Use cues as a reminder throughout your day to initiate the routine. For instance, place your toothbrush and contact solution near your bathroom faucet so that you remember to brush your teeth and clean your contacts before heading to bed. If you don’t like counter clutter, how about a decorative wallboard with an artsy checklist of nighttime routines in the bathroom?
4. Self-Motivation
Last week’s tip, Starting Tasks, addressed external influences for task initiation. This week focuses on internally driven motivators. What stimulates action for you?
What stimulates action for you? Plug into your stimulators. Image by Colin Behrens from Pixabay
A. Innate motivation
B. Tricks or deals with yourself to start a task or assignment
C. Reminders or nudges to get you moving
D. Crises or looming deadlines
E. Situation dependent response
Use the strategies below to ignite and sustain motivation based on your selection above.
A. Innate motivation
You’re born with natural drive. That’s truly admirable. You likely accomplish a lot, and in a way that buttresses you and your efforts. Even those with unflappable motivation reserves encounter circumstances when motivation is lagging. Use information in the other profiles to ignite the occasional boost to get moving.
B. Tricks and Deals
When you’re feeling blah or uninspired to take action, are you prone to cutting deals with yourself? Five more sit-ups, then dessert is the reward. Finish the bill payments, then splurge on your favorite TV series. You get the picture. I tenaciously held yoga planks well beyond what I thought I could Tuesday night with the promise of a luscious cupcake after dinner. Despite the shaking and cursing under my breath, you better believe I held it. As long as deal cuts are healthy for your body and mind and they entice you to completion, then go for it. If the deals aren’t so sweet, feel free to experiment with other methods to identify where your spark plugs are hiding. Check-in with curiosity to see where resistance is bubbling up. Once you know the reasons, you’re armed with more logic to determine next steps or possible consequences of inaction.
C. Reminders & Nudges
Reminders and nudges can come from any corner of your support system. They can be electronic alerts on your computer screen or phone audio or vibrations or a combination (mine are a combo to ensure I get the message). You may also need reminders, hopefully gentle, from those in your circles. In fact, last night I asked my husband to remind me, should he see me in the kitchen close to 5 pm this evening, to feel free to detour me back to my office for the meeting I’m supposed to lead. It’s out of my normal routine, so the more tactics that have my back, the better. Naggy nudges are unhelpful (speaking from personal experience). Find ways to develop effective received and delivered communication to spark action with minimal aggravation.
D. Crises & Looming Deadlines
Crisis and urgency response is effective when unanticipated emergencies arise. If you’ve mastered that, you’ll be a go-to person when disaster arise. Relying on self-created crises and last minute efforts is stress-inducing for you and those awaiting deliverables. Cortisol levels rise under stressful conditions. Dopamine hits from continuous deadline dodgers might feel good in the moment, not so much long-term. Tap into enjoyable dopamine releasers such as energetic music, hobbies, explore your spirit of adventure, express your artistic side. Speak with your healthcare practitioner about supplements and nutritional adjustments to increase dopamine levels. Play around with time and project management strategies to tweak pacing progress to avoid deadline crashes. Also review Night Owl, Marathoner, Reacting to Immediate Tasks, and Preventing Meltdown tips.
E. Situation dependent response
Frankly all these profiles thus far are situation dependent. That’s useful information, and it allows you the flexibility to sample different techniques to see what works, where and when.
For additional motivational support, download 9 Motivational Steps
With these steps you can hopefully prevent overwhelm meltdowns. Image by Christine Sponchia from Pixabay
Sensing that you’ve read this tip before? No need to question your sanity. If you’ve been with me a while, you likely saw it a year ago. Why am I reprising this topic? Because it’s a perpetual theme for my clients. And embarrassingly, it happens to me far too often. Last night after returning from a trip was the most recent example. To try to help those who don’t personally experience this phenomena understand what it might be like for others, here’s the gyst. There’s a self-imposed pressure to do it all, right away, and most of the time…perfectly.
Most everyone is buried beneath the barrage of external expectations such as meet project deadlines, schedule health or personal care appointments, restock empty refrigerators, fulfill partner requests, maneuver children’s extra-curricular activities, comply with school demands, and accommodate volunteer commitments. That’s already a lot on the plate. Too much in fact for those who experience emotional overload. Now imagine on top of that, you add layers of emotional encumbrances. The overwhelm totality implodes into a despairing meltdown.
Feeling the pressure to do it all, do it now, do it perfectly! Image by Robin Higgins from Pixabay.jpg
When we take a step back, often times, we can detect that the pressure comes from within. No one actually tells us to do it all, right away, perfectly. We tend to be our fiercest task drivers and harshest critics. Yes, I’m raising my hand. We don’t want these plaguing behaviors to persist. But change is hard, and when it finally happens, behavioral progress can be fleeting.
When this tip was first published, two new clients were simultaneously in the throes of self-berating. They hadn’t finished their organizing projects within their pre-ordained timeframes. Both were frustratingly unable to move on to other smaller, easier tasks until the rooms they started were completely finished to their high standards. And both were prohibitively stuck. Family members expressed irritation with the messy lack of progress and the unsafe conditions. Both reached out to me to guide them to the finish line. We moved at their pace. They made change happen mostly without extraneous stress.
So what do you do to avoid a “do it all” meltdown? Let’s look at some pacing strategies in order to keep our brain cells advantageously functioning and our blood pressure in an acceptable range.
1. Get really real.
We've all heard Rome wasn’t built in a day. The more cluttered, the more complex the situation, the longer it will take. I’ve been organizing throughout my life. I'm fairly well skilled at it. Unless working with a team, it's doubtful I could conquer a room in a day. In fact, even when I’ve worked with teams, we rarely completed an entire room organizing project in one day. A linen closet may take a few hours. The left side of a desk with 2-3 piles of papers could take half a day, please don’t beat yourself up if a room is taking days especially if you are working alone mashed in between the rest of your daily duties. Timing also depends on your physical abilities, reading comprehension, and decision-making capabilities. You can only move as fast as you can. Overdoing it won't do you any favors physically or emotionally. Pace yourself with respect for yourself.
2. Question Priorities and Timelines.
How urgent or important is the project? Look at due dates. Knock out urgent or critical tasks before starting new ones. Once you know how much time you have, think about how long it will realistically take to complete it. If your daughter needs her soccer uniform cleaned by tomorrow afternoon, tonight toss the laundry load in while dinner is heating. By the time dinner is done, the uniform will be ready to be hung dry. No crazy running around tomorrow. In fact, she may be old enough to give you a hand with starting the load, folding, and hanging. Get all the assists that you can.
3. Break it down instead of breaking down.
Choose 2-3 easy, doable tasks or steps within larger projects to get started. This will allow a fast win. Aiming unrealistically high can lead to feelings of inadequacy and blow your motivation. We want to keep this manageable. If you finish early, add another task, one at a time. Select something that is reasonable within your time and energy constraints. If you don't have the bandwidth, grant yourself a refresh break.
If you have fair warning about an upcoming event such as travel, pre-plan and pre-act as much as you can. Toss clean laundry directly into the suitcase rather than putting away travel clothes. Pre-clean if you abhor returning to a dirty house. Pay all pending bills before you leave. Clear out as much email prior to leaving. Ask yourself, what can I do to make life easier when I return? What do I typically struggle with? Whatever you anticipate will help relieve pressure down the road is useful to do now when you have a few free moments.
4. Leave enough time to straighten up afterwards.
Create safe passageways and areas for seating or working if necessary. Use stackable boxes, keeping them at a height that reduces injury in the event they topple. Heavier boxes at the bottom, lighter boxes as you stack. Your family will be less likely to grouse if they aren't inconvenienced by extra messes and hazards. The less stuff in your line of vision, the less chance of sensory overload.
If you've got a list of things to do, but your not feeling it, rev your engines with these 9 Motivational Steps. Then keep going until you reach a logical or time limitation stopping point. Fill out the form to access the 9 Motivational Steps booklet. You’ll find it under ADHD Specific Tips.
6. Celebrate every win.
This is so important, particularly for ADHD brains, if you feel like wins are few and far between. Pump yourself up with pats on the back or treating yourself to a token of appreciation. Nothing fancy, expensive, or causes clutter. A cup of tea, hot bath, or a long walk on a beautiful day or even a short jaunt around the block, anything that lets your psyche know that you’ve done well and deserve thanks. If someone in your household voices criticism about your progress, invite them to give a hand or in a neutral tone, let them know you’re getting there, one step at a time.
Reward yourself with a soothing hot beverage when you’re done. Image by Free-Photos from Pixabay coffee cup.jpg
Remember, doing it all, at once, perfectly every time isn’t doable. It isn’t reasonable to expect that of yourself. You’ll get there if you keep the momentum going in a way that works for you. I typically get through with greater ease via lots of focused breathing, podcasts, and/or favorite music. Play around. See what works for you. If one way doesn’t, toss it. If something works well, note it so you don’t forget. And, don’t be shocked if a process is magical once or twice, then tanks. Keep experimenting, make it a game, keep your critiques neutral, cheer yourself on, and reward yourself accordingly.
